After losing his virginity with the love of his life, james didn't expect get pregnant. But that wasn't the problem, he didn't know how to tell Net. Being in high school, and pregnant wasn't on his list.
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James and Alex made there way to the footie field to watch Net practice. James decided that maybe he did need new friends that wasn't also Net', so he thought that maybe Alex would be good company.
After maths class, james found out that Alex was also in his English, and biology class as well. He felt bad, but james guesses that he was just too stuck in his own little world to pay attention to anyone else.He didn't like the fact that Eleanor was also in the English class, but he had to deal with it. James knew that she's trying to get in his boyfriends pants, but won't be able to because Net is really loyal to james.
But what she said to him angered him a bit. James wanted to say something to her, but Alex made sure to calm him down before anybody got them in trouble.
They found a seat in the bleachers and waited for net to come out of the locker room and to the field to greet him. They really didn't have time to hang out at lunch because james was too busy talking to Alex to really pay attention to net.He couldn't help it because he figured that Alex had an interesting life and wanted to know more about him. He doesn't know about the abuse, but Alex isn't close enough to james for him to tell about net. It's a hard topic for Alex to discuss about, but he had a feeling that he will be able to trust james enough to tell him.
He's been seeing a shrink, but he just doesn't feel comfortable to tell her about it either. Cole is roaming the halls and he isn't feeling safe. Maybe even when Cole is gone, he still won't feel safe because he would never know if he will fall in love with another guy that is also abusive.
What he did know was that whoever he ends up falling in love with, he will make sure to treat him right. He will sure to treat them like a prince because that's what they would deserve. Maybe even spoil them because he just wants them to feel loved and nothing more.He wants to feel loved too, but that's just going to have to wait because he just isn't mentally prepared for all that yet. He can't let a person touch him without a flinch, or sleep without waking up in the middle of the night with tears and sweat glistering down his face.
He wanted a change. He just felt so disgusted with himself that he dyed his hair blonde and worked out enough to gain some muscles. He would've tried out for a sports team, but he just didn't have the confidence to do so. It was like something was grasping his arm and not letting him go.
He still feels that tug sometimes, but he would always push it away. All those friends he had, they didn't even bat an eye at him. It was his fault since Cole convinced him that they were only just trying to take him away from him. It should've been the first sign, but Alex was just too young and naive to notice anything.He knew that he should've left the moment Cole slapped him. The only thing that was keeping him from doing that was Cole's eyes. It held something that Alex thought he could figure out what it was if he stayed, but that left him unstable.
The last day he was Cole, he'd realized that the only thing that was in Cole's eyes were emptiness. Nothing but cold irises swimming around his eyes. His stares didn't make his heart flutters, only makes him want to run away.His hugs didn't feel cuddly, it felt like he was keeping him captive. His kisses were just reminders to Alex that he put himself through this. All the things Cole has done to him wasn't his fault, but he though otherwise. The way Cole would touch him in places he wouldn't want to be touched, but let him anyways because he knew if he even tried to stop him, he wouldn't be able to attend school the next day due to the bruise.
