❛ Look After You. Chrollo Lucilfer

xxii. because of you

The ride back to Keiko's mansion was steeped in silence. Keiko was too absorbed in her thoughts to initiate any conversation, and Chrollo, ever the gentleman, respected her unspoken desire for solitude. He sensed that she needed this time to process what had just occurred—that someone genuinely cared for her in a way she had never known.

As the car glided through the dimly lit streets, Keiko's mind raced with a thousand unspoken questions and emotions she couldn't quite grasp. The realization that someone could care for her without expecting anything in return was both comforting and unsettling.

Chrollo glanced at her from the corner of his eye, noting the slight furrow in her brow, the way her hands clutched her coat a little tighter. He knew that this revelation, this unfamiliar tenderness, was a lot for her to take in. He had witnessed her strength, her sharpness, and even her vulnerabilities, but this was something different. It was as if a new layer of her was slowly being peeled back, revealing a side of her she rarely allowed anyone to see.

He considered breaking the silence, offering words of reassurance or perhaps a distraction, but something held him back. He understood that this was her moment, one she needed to navigate on her own. So he remained a silent presence beside her, a quiet anchor in the storm of her thoughts.

When they finally arrived at the mansion, Chrollo helped her out of the car, his touch gentle yet steady. Keiko looked up at him, her eyes searching his as if trying to find answers to questions she wasn't even sure how to ask.

"Thank you," she said softly, her voice barely above a whisper.

Chrollo gave her a small nod, his expression as calm and unreadable as ever. "There's no need to thank me."

She hesitated for a moment, then offered a faint smile before taking the first steps toward her marble porch. Just as she was about to punch in the numbers to unlock her door, she turned to face the man beside her, vulnerability shimmering in her eyes.

"Chrollo, I—" she began, but then faltered, her brow furrowing as her words trailed off. It was as if finishing the sentence would be a betrayal to herself.

Chrollo, ever perceptive, noticed this and gave her a gentle, reassuring smile. He then softly whispered, "take your time, lovely."

She sucked in a deep breath, gathering whatever courage was left within her to voice the words that no longer felt like they belonged to her, as if speaking them aloud would make them real in a way she wasn't sure she was ready to face.

"...I'm willing to forgive them, if it means you'll get that chain lifted off your heart," she finally whispered, her voice barely audible yet laden with the weight of a decision that had taken all her strength to reach. The words felt foreign on her tongue, each one a tiny sacrifice she hadn't expected to make, but she knew they had to be said.

As they hung in the air between them, fragile and tentative, it was as if time itself paused. The admission was more than just an offer of forgiveness; it was a relinquishing of the anger and pain she had held onto for so long. And as difficult as it was to voice those words, she knew that they carried the power to change everything— for him, for her, and for the uncharted path that lay ahead of them both.

Chrollo frowned at her words, not out of confusion, but from worry. Selflessness, especially of this magnitude, was never a good look for her. It might have suited him, as he had learned to navigate its complexities, but on Keiko Rei? It seemed so out of place. Forgiving Gerard and Mei would mean she was sacrificing a part of herself, giving up whatever morals and boundaries she had clung to. It wasn't just about lifting the chain from his heart; it was about her own integrity, and he feared that in her quest to help him, she was risking losing a piece of who she once was.