Under Control (FreenBecky)

Chapter 21: Obsession

I turn around, wanting to leave faster, under the pressure of strong emotions and alcohol, I have absolutely no idea what to do, where to go. I rub my eyes with my fingers hard, trying to bring myself to my senses. Here is the elevator. I press the button. I am nervous, waiting, feverishly shaking my legs, as if this will speed up the process of the cabin's arrival. I hear her calling my name, her voice is getting louder, she is fussing, looking for something, cursing.

"Billy, where are those damn slippers?" she shouts irritably.

The elevator is slow, and the tension is unbearably growing, and I can't wait any longer and head towards the stairs. I quickly go down the steps, freezing in surprise when I see her at the bottom, she arrived earlier and on the first floor she grabs my hand, not letting me pass by.

"Damn it, Becca, you're terribly drunk" she reaches her hand to my face, but I dodge, increasing the distance between us "what happened?" Her voice is anxious, sympathetic, so familiar.

"What is he doing there in his underwear?" I ignore her question, irritably throwing my own.

"He's living there" she answers, simply killing me with the calmness of her voice, the ease with which she states this fact to me.

I abruptly free my hand from her grip, backing away towards the exit, running my eyes over her, stopping for a second at her bare feet, noticing that she is standing on her toes, on the dirty cold tiles of the driveway.

"So Houston?" I ask the last question, clearly catching her off guard, because she is silent in surprise, not for long, a second, two, as if choosing how to present this to me correctly, but I do not wait for an answer. Her confusion is enough for me to draw my own conclusions.

I turn around and run away, jerking away from the spot, not paying attention to her shouts.

I fly through the night, almost empty streets of Los Angeles, breaking all possible rules that simply do not exist for me now. Tears, a veil covering my eyes, choke with resentment and disappointment. I go down to the expressway, accelerate, wanting to squeeze out of myself the saving adrenaline, cutting through the dusty air of the metropolis. The speedometer needle approaches the maximum, I brush away tears with my hand, mentally forcing myself to stop crying. My phone is blowing up in the bag on the seat next to me, and I even know who it is, sending it in all known directions.

Something appears... unexpectedly... out of the darkness. Small and alive, right in front of me. I slam on the brakes, veer to the right, losing control. The car starts spinning, and then it's thrown into a ditch.

A sharp pain pierces my entire body. Squeezing out my last strength, I reach for my bag, looking for my phone, find it, bring it to my eyes, blink, activate the screen with my finger, freeze, running my eyes over the lines several times.

"Billy is moving tomorrow and I'm not going to Houston. Please come back, I'm so worried. I love you."

And this short message is enough for me to feel happy despite everything, I smile before I pass out, losing consciousness.

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What's wrong with me? Am I sleeping?What a strange dream. There is complete impenetrable darkness all around. A dead silence has taken over the space. My body is at rest. I want to move, but I can't, not because I lack strength, no, I just don't feel like the mistress of my body, but this doesn't frighten me, my soul is light and calm, it is completely pure, weightless, like a light feather fluttering in the air flow. I feel good, nothing bothers me anymore. I want to stay here. Serenely surrendering myself to the power of this mysterious oblivion.