𝗙𝗟𝗔𝗪𝗟𝗘𝗦𝗦 .ᐟ c.s

⁰¹¹fuck !

💋

❛ but mostly, i hate the way i don't hate you.

not even close. not even a little bit. not even at all ❜

flawless ✷ chris sturniolo !

・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈maxi's pov...💋

. . . 10:56PM IN THE EVENING

      fuck.

that's the first thing i think as i'm storming off back into the house.

i think i was just running on pure adrenaline in the argument. and i definitely dug a little too far into the argument than i would've hoped and won't be able to fix it now.

not necessarily that i want to fix it. i want him to stay away, to leave me alone. but i also don't want there to be an even stronger hatred between us. its already hate to juggle the hate i have for him from that incident three years ago, but this?

i hate holding grudges and hate having enemies. it just feels disgusting that someone can hate so strongly.

so i want to avoid that at all costs.

but how am i able to fix this? i mean, how can i dig myself out of this hole now?

・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈・┈chris's pov...⚡️

. . . 10:56PM IN THE EVENING

      i know i shouldn't have followed her to that damn bathroom. i know i have to leave her alone and put distance between us so i can overcome my obsession over her.

i knew all that.

but i still followed her, and i feel like a monster for it. i feel like a villain for going after someone who clearly doesn't want me.

she's just so innocent, so bright. and i'm the opposite.

i play football and am the 'fuck boy' of the school. i can't control my emotions but it's hard for me to show them to the people i trust the most. and, worst of all, i'm the type of guy everyone's parents tell you to stay away from.

i'm the monster to maxi's angel.

i'm the dark and she's the light.

it's always going to be like that, and i guess i just have to deal with it. but it makes me sick to the stomach.

it makes me feel sick that i lost her.

but it's not like i ever even had her. and i can't lose something i never had.

but it feels like i'm drowning, even though i'm on solid ground. like i'm suffocating in smoke in a raging house fire, even though clear rain pours down outside.

i just feel lost.

i ding on my phone interrupts my thoughts. i slip my phone out of my pocket to look at it. my phone light casts a warm glow on my dark face as i read the notification.

oh shit.

⋆ 💌 ⋆.˚⛓️ notes ::

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