Egotistical

39

It had been six days, six days and Nassiah sat in a coma. They had to put him in one so his body could relax, it wasn't looking good. They nurses and doctors told Alonso every day it wasn't looking good. They even tried to ask what he would want to do if his heart gave out- for the third time. Alonso didn't answer. He usually never did. Stuck in a trance sitting at the hospital for most of the day praying his husband would wake up. When they say it takes a village? Well the village is working over time. Tash had slept in the guest room- Alonso's dad had to plan a funeral for his daughter all alone- Dior was even at the Chavera house which was now more like a foster home. Everyone was there. Dj never left Kings side because King was almost worse then Alonso- if that was possible. He didn't eat, he couldn't sleep all he did was sit at Nassiah's side. He has never seen husband this quiet.

Maurice and Tash took turns taking the twins to school, picking them up and making dinner. Alonso would try- he would try a whole lot to be there for his kids but every time he did he would be stuck in a trance. Naylani acting out- trying to be up under that boy every day. If you asked Alonso ? He couldn't breathe. He couldn't help but blame himself time after time. So here he sat at Nassiah's bed like he has been for the past three days.

"Baby- I need you to wake up"he whispered softly. "Like I need you too- everyone's saying to prepare myself but how could I? You've been attached to me sense we met" he let out a dry chuckle shaking his head. His cheeks stained with tears permanently now. "I don't get- I don't know how I'm suppose to do this without you. I'm trying Pa- more than ever. But it's like how can I go to a house that we bought? Look at the family we built without you?" He asked as the tears streamed down his face. "I never thought I'd miss you yelling at me and cursing me out so much- everything is too quiet. Everything" he held his husbands hand and kissed it a few times. "I just I don't know- it's like we said till death do we part but I never thought - I guess I just never thought death was an option for us" he admitted quietly. "Now I think all the times were I took you for granted- I didn't give you the fifth kiss in a row, or I didn't look up from paperwork as you told me about your day at the shop" Alonso stressed. "How can there be Alonso without Nassiah?"

Alonso sat there for a couple hours more until Donnie walked in. "Zo go take a shower" he started and Alonso just waved him off. "Take a shower kiss your kids good night and let me speak with my brother" he tried again. Alonso didn't like leaving Nassiah- he didn't want to miss it. What if the second he goes home Nassiah decides to die? He couldn't ever bring himself to move from this spot. "Please Zo- ion wanna cry in front of your ass today. I did enough of that" Donnie mumbled and Alonso finally looked at Donnie- Donnie who was still in the hospital who manage to walk down to Nassiah's room. He sometimes forgot other people might love Nassiah as much as he did, he sent a small nod and got up.

  "I'll be back baby" he mumbled and kissed his husbands  head.

  "And if you find my son- tell him his dad almost died like the fuck- nigga found out I made it and said fuck me?" Donnie joked and Alonso only gave him a tired nod. When Alonso left Donnie sat down in the chair and shook his head.

"Yo bitch ass better wake the fuck up Nassiah" he spoke and sucked his teeth. "Like for real- got my ass crying, Tash crying yo damn kids? A mess. Yo fucking husband? You made it a big deal bout him leaving you- your ass better not leave that boy: he's a fucking mess" Donnie spoke as if Nassiah could speak back. "Not to mention- I broke 2 ribs and got shot damn near as much times as fifty for your ass" he complained. "You and Alonso I know yall got something special but us? Nah nigga. I'm not standing up and talking to you bout no damn funeral" he casually shook his head.  Silence filled the room and when he just looked at Nassiah he got more and more angry every time. He wanted to just shake him away or punch him hard enough- Nassiah never let anyone just punch him. But the nurses explained to Donnie multiple times that would only make things worse. So here he was, trying to understand feelings he didn't want to feel.