𝙩𝙝𝙚 𝙧𝙪𝙨𝙨𝙞𝙖𝙣 𝙗𝙤𝙮

the distraction

boris pulled me up from the bed, "get dressed", he told me while he dug through his closet trying to find something to put on. theo, who was now leaving the room, shouted something to boris that i didn't hear. i walked over to boris's bathroom, closing the door behind me. "boris!" i said loudly through the closed door, "mhm?". "can i use your toothbrush?", i asked holding up the mangled toothbrush inspecting it, "dont have to ask lalka.", he yelled back laughing. i hate not knowing what he's calling me, for all i know he could be saying, "don't have to ask stupid bitch!", but i've gotten used to it by now. i turn on the faucet and put toothpaste on the brush before scrubbing my teeth. i turn off the water and look at myself in the mirror as i spit out the rest of the foamed up toothpaste. i look like actual shit. my hair is a mess, my sew in hair extensions are disconnected from the left side of my head and peaking through my natural hair, my eyes look like raccoon eyes, and the hickey on my neck is a dark reddish purple color. ugh. i turn the water back on and scrub at my face till the mascara is finally off. lucky i still have a hair band on my wrist, i fold my body forward and put my hair up in what my old friend autumn used to describe as a, "hideous hangover bun". after i inspect my reached appearance in the mirror, i look around on the bathroom floor for boris's sweater. i find it crumpled up on the floor beside a massive pile of what i assume are dirty clothes. i slip off my sweater from last night, throw it onto the laundry pile, and put the sweater over my head. as i pull it down onto my body i get the strong smell of boris: cigarettes, liquor, spearmint, and to be completely honest slight body oder. let me be real right quick: i heavily fuck with the way he smells even when he fucking STINKS. it's sexy. sue me. i take off my skirt, throwing it on top of my sweater on the laundry pile, and walk out the bathroom door. "i need pants", i say walking out rubbing my eyes with my hands, still trying to fully wake up. i take my hands away from my eyes and low and behold, theo is standing right in front of the dresser scrolling on his phone. he looks up at me and giggles, "yes you do lucy lu.", he says tossing me a pair of sweatpants from the dresser. i suck my lips into my mouth for a second before catching them. "why thank you Theodore.", i say taking a deep breath slightly embarrassed. i don't know why i'm embarrassed though. he's seen me in my underwear. hell the first day i met him he saw me in my underwear. maybe it's cause im not the least bit intoxicated right now, i don't know.

i put on the sweats, jumping as i pull them up around my waist. they fit me more like leggings, i swear it drives me crazy how small all of boris's pants are. however, the pants are always too long on me, so it makes me feel better having to roll them up. "where's boris?", i say folded over cuffing the sweatpants. "downstairs making you coffee.", theo tells me as he puts his phone in his pocket. i stand back up after im done cuffing both legs of the pants and smile, "i didn't know he had a coffee maker.", i say suprised. theo laugh, "oh no, no he does not. he saw coffee grounds at your house the other day and called me insisting that i bring some over immediately so that you could have coffee in the morning whenever you spent the night here. he's boiling coffee grounds in water down there lucy. on the stove. boiling coffee grounds, in water.", he says the last sentence slowly for me to soak it all in. i slightly let my mouth drop open and scrunch my eyebrows low, "do i have to drink it?", i ask theo whispering. "he will be so disappointed if you don't. when he's not looking pour it into a bush or something.", he tells me whispering back. i take a deep breath as theo leads me out of the room and down the stairs. we walk into the kitchen and i see boris pouring a slightly brown liquid into a chipped coffee mug. he turns around when he hears theo clear his throat, and smiles when he sees me. he holds up the coffee, "i make for you, coffee, yes? it's good, i tried.", he tells me walking over to me and handing me the mug. i smile at him, "that's so sweet thank you.", i say giving him a kiss on the cheek. i look down at the coffee. it is utterly horrifying. the "coffee" is a murky brown color, clear enough for me to see the lose grounds settling on the bottom of the mug. i look back up at him, "it looks good!", i say with the best fake smile i can put on my face. he's still smiling when he looks at me expectantly, "drink, tell me if is good!", he says excitedly. oh how i dread hearing those fucking words. i smile and bring the cup up to my mouth taking a small sip. i nearly spit it out. if i didn't know better i would say this is some sort of cruel joke. i force myself to swallow the bitter, hot, burnt tasting "coffee", and look up at him, "mmm, that's good boris", i say, restraining myself from being physically sick. theo lets out a small giggle and i step on his foot before boris can hear him. "you like it?", boris asked me with a proud smile. "yes i loveeee it, so good boris.", i say smiling back at him. he kisses my forehead and takes my hand, "ok, let's go to grocery store", he tells me and theo. before he can pull us both out of the house i turn to theo, "theo this coffee boris made is sooo good, here try some!", i say loudly giving theo a smug smirk. theo's face drops and he slightly mouths the words, "please, no.", to me as i shove the mug towards him. boris is still walking holding onto my hand, as we all walk through the door, "yes potter, try. is good i swear.", boris says walking to his car as theo and i trail behind. i hand the mug over to theo placing it in his hand, "take a big sip dude, you really gotta taste how amazing it is", i say smiling at theo with a toothy grin. he sticks up his middle finger and glares at me silently before looking down worriedly at the coffee and taking a sip. his face contorts in a manner that makes me bite my tongue to refrain from laughing. just as he looks like he's gonna spit it out boris opens the back door of his car for me and looks at us. theo quickly swallows it and smiles at boris giving him a thumbs up. i climb into the car as boris walks to the drivers side. theo hands me the coffee cup, "i think im gonna be sick", he says with a groan. i laugh at him and pour the liquid on the grass beside boris's car, making sure he's turned where he can't see me. "kindly kill your self lucy lu.", theo whispers back to me as he grips his stomach. i blow him a kiss and giggle as he walks around to crawl over boris into the passenger seat. once we're all in the car i feel my phone buzzing and take it out of my pocket. moms calling me. i look into my driveway and see the truck is gone, so i assume she's calling me from work. i answer, sort of alarmed at her calling instead of texting. "hello? is everything okay?", i holding my phone to my ear. "hey baby! yes, everything's okay i just miss your voice. how was that party last night? i saw your note, did you have fun?", i hear my mothers voice say from the speaker on my phone. my stomach churns a bit before i answer, "yea! lots of fun!", i lie, "how's work?", i ask her when i hear the the talking of customers and clattering of plates in the background. she sighed, "busy as hell. i need a cigarette.", she laughs softly before continuing, "will you be home tonight? i get off at 10pm and i wanna see you. i feel like it's been ages since i saw your sweet face.", she says with a sigh. "sure, i'll be home tonight. we can watch a movie and hangout.". i hear someone yelling my moms name in the back of the call, "shit, like six more people just came in. that sounds good, i gotta go hon, i love you!", she says. i hear her hang up and put my phone on my lap, looking up at the boys. "so how are we gonna get food?", i ask them suspiciously when i see them smiling at me. "you'll see.", says boris as he pulls out of his driveway and drives down the road. as we drive theo rolls a questionable looking blunt and lights it before handing it to me. i take a few hits and climb onto the center console, holding the blunt to boris's mouth, and scratching his head while he drives. boris smiles at me and nods at theo. i pass the blunt over to him and he looks at me, "boris gets special treatment and not me?", he says lifting his eyebrows. i decide it's a perfect moment to make theo uncomfortable, which is so very easy to do. "boris fucks me, so yes he does get special treatment.", i say putting the blunt between theo's fingers and smiling. theo's eyes widen, "oh well i didnt know...that you two...were-", he stutters before boris cuts him off with a loud laugh. theo turns his head back forward and hits the blunt silently as boris and i laugh for what seems like forever. the laughter dies down when boris pulls into a grocery store with a name i don't recognize. theo puts the blunt out on the lid of the mason jar before throwing the half smoked blunt inside it and closing it back up. "can someone please tell me what were doing now?", i ask when boris parks the car. theo looks at me with a smile, "okay so, usually when boris and i "shop", we just go around and find an isle no one's in to snatch shit from.", he tells me. "so we're stealing.", i say cutting in. " 'so we're stealing' ", he mocks me before continuing, "yes lu, but here's the thing: since there's three of us now, we can create distractions to get people out of the isle while one of us grabs the shit we need. understand?", he explains to me like he's explaining to a kindergartener how to cut paper. i roll my eyes, "yes i understand. but who's gonna be the distraction and who's gonna get the stuff?", i ask curiously. "i don't care, we just need to make people uncomfortable enough to leave the isle we need to grab shit from.", he says back with a shrug. boris smiles at me, "lucy and i will be distraction, just get us good stuff potter.", he says without taking his eyes off me. from the look he's giving me i'm sure he has a plan. we all hop out of the car and walk towards the store. i look at boris, "so what's your big plan?", i ask him as he takes my hand in his while we walk. he looks down at me, "fake fight with me, eh? we make loud and uncomfortable for people in isles.", he says shrugging with a half smile on his face. honestly this is pretty smart for boris to have thought of, and i've watched enough lifetime movies to know how to fake fight.

we walk into the grocery store looking so nonchalant you probably wouldn't even glance our way. theo looks over at us and mouths the word, "pasta" and nods to an isle with a few kids about a year or two younger than us in it. boris looks at me and i nod. we walk into the isle, untangles our hands, and start "looking through stuff". boris lifts his eyebrows at me. so i guess i have to be the instigator, ok alright i can do this. i think for a moment, than without hesitation, i reached over to his pants pocket and pull out his phone. i shove it in his face and loudly, but not loud enough for any employees to hear, start yelling at him. "YOU TOLD ME YOU WERENT TEXTING HER ANYMORE. I KNEW IT, I KNEW YOU WERE A FUCKING LIAR.", i said to him shaking the phone in his face, and trying my hardest not to smile when he accidentally cracked a small giggle. he caught on quickly though because before i knew it he was snatching the phone out of my hand and yelling back at me, "SHE IS MY FRIEND, ONLY IS A FRIEND, HM? YOU ARE SO FUCKING CRAZY, CAN WE JUST SHOP?", he says back to me surprisingly in character. he continues shouting something at me as i lock eyes with one of the terrified looking teens behind us in the isle. "фальшивая драка, фальшивая драка, я так тебя люблю. эти люди чертовы идиоты!", he shouts as i start to call out the teen i made eye contact with. "WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU LOOKING AT HUH? KEEP FUCKIN STARING I DARE YOU.", i say to the kid raising my eyebrows and using the scariest tone i can muster. the kid looks at his friends and they all quickly exit the isle, allowing theo to come in. theo swiftly picks up the pasta and places it in the inside pocket of his jacket, so smoothly i wasn't even sure if he got it or not till he turned to us and nodded. i looked at boris and laughed as we followed theo out of the isle. theo stopped next at the sauce isle and nodded to boris. boris and i walked into the isle, and saw an elderly man and what looked like his wife in the isle. i smiled at boris at got on my toes to whisper to him, "follow my lead.", i said to him before grabbing the back of his neck and kissing him fiercely. i can feel the his confusion and i press my lips to his, but once again, he catches on quickly. he matches the speed of my lips and pushes me into a shelf, pinning me to it as he continues exploring my lips. oh he's good. i twist us around slamming him on the same shelf i just was. i grab his hand of my hip and slide it down to my ass, which he squeezes with a firm grip. we continue our little "distraction" for about another thirty seconds before we hear someone clear their throat loudly. i detach from boris's lips and and look up to see theo, standing in front of us, tapping him foot. "they left the isle the moment he shoved you into the shelf's. you two could've stopped about two minutes ago.", he says looking like he's trying his best not to laugh. i look back at him shocked, "why didn't you say something?", i ask him. "looked like you two were having...fun.", he says looking at boris pants. i follow his gaze. oh my fuck. i didn't even realize how hard he was while i was kissing him. lady's and fucking gentlemen that dick is HUGE from the look of it. i look back up at boris with wide eyes and see him standing there smugly. "not ashamed", he says shrugging. theo turns away and we follow him into the meat isle(ironic right), where no one else is. as me and boris stand in front of theo, guarding him from anyone who may pass by and see him. boris looks at me and throws an arm around my shoulder before bending down and whispering in my ear, "so i've fucked you before?", he says obviously referring to the thing i said to theo in the car. my face turns a bright red and my eyes widen as stands up straight and laughs at my expression. "dont look so embarrassed, kochanie. you know i'd do it right now if you wanted me to.", he says smirking smugly before kissing the top of my head and following theo as he walks towards the exit of the store. okay so that definitely just made me brain think a lot of things. i'm gonna be thinking about those words all night, i can promise you that.