Gossip Girl: It Had To Be You

A kiss is just a kiss-at least, that's the lie we tell ourselves

Blair sat on her hands on one of the hot tub's submerged marble ledges. The jets pummeled her back, causing her whole body to vibrate. Nate sat on the opposite ledge, his damp chin resting listlessly on the side of the tub as he watched Serena kiss Chuck and then Donatella. What the fuck was going on? Serena could be such a tease. Or maybe he'd been totally wrong and she wasn't as into him as he thought she was.

But maybe all was not lost. He was still going to the cotillion with L'Wren. The loss of his virginity was imminent. This was a good thing. The idea that he was going to have sex with Serena instead of L'Wren had been just a momentary blunder caused by too much THC in the marijuana. El Capitán. El Capitán! He raised his head. "I'm late," he told Blair urgently. "I have to go."

Blair knew this was her cue. She blinked the steam out of her fierce blue eyes, steeling herself for the most important role she'd played thus far in the movie that was her life. Her mother was fat and pathetic. Her father was selfish and gay. Her little brother was destined for loserdom. Basically, her life had been a colossal waste of time—until now. Nate was right there in front of her. Carpe diem. Now was her chance to seize the day.

Among other things worth seizing.

Nate lunged for one of the white plush towels folded neatly on the heated metal shelving unit standing just out of reach of the tub. "Damn."

Blair sprang out of the tub and gathered up two towels. She wrapped one around her body and then handed one to Nate.

He got out, trying to act as cool as possible, and wrapped the towel tightly around his middle. "Thanks," he smiled down at her appreciatively and shook the water out of his hair. "Damn, I'm so late."

"I don't want you to go, Nate," Blair murmured again, her voice quavering but insistent. Water dripped off the ends of her long dark hair and onto her bare shoulders, causing her to shiver.

Nate's glittering green eyes seemed to brighten even more as he looked at her, as if he were noticing her for the first time. Blair looked up at him, feeling like she was going to be sick again, but this time in a good way. "What if we—" she began, wishing her heart wasn't beating quite so loudly, so she could hear herself think. "What if we just—" She stopped and licked her shapely lips. Nate's almond-shaped eyes and perfectly sculpted face seemed to be the only things of color in the room. God, how she loved him. "Why don't we just kiss?" she finished quickly.

Nate frowned. Blair wanted him to kiss her—now, when he was about to leave to meet a very hot older girl and hopefully have sex with her? Now, when he'd just been rejected by Serena? How could he kiss Blair when they'd known each other since preschool? She used to leave little lumpy Play-Doh hearts in his shoes when he took them off during nap time. He cinched his towel a little tighter. Actually, it made perfect sense. Blair had always had a crush on him, and she was one of his best friends. She was pretty and funny and smart, and she probably knew him better than he knew himself. She was such a perfectionist, but she'd always accepted him, with all his faults.

Serena had left because she didn't want to kiss him. But Blair did, and he loved Blair too. He'd never thought about kissing her until now, but why not? Maybe he'd had the wrong girl all along. Maybe he'd just lusted after Serena and thought it was love, when really it was Blair he loved all along. Even the way she said "Let's just kiss" was pretty romantic. She wasn't all hot and bothered. She didn't want to writhe around naked in the hot tub like L'Wren would have. She just wanted to keep their towels on and kiss, which made him feel sort of mature and cool.

Nate took a step forward. Blair looked up at him expectantly, her lips parted. He wrapped his arms around her as he'd done so many times before, and it wasn't awkward or tense—it was totally familiar. He ducked his head down and kissed her, as he'd also done so many times before, but this time he kissed her on her nice peach-colored lips, not her cheek. The kiss was long and sweet, and she was sort of exploring his mouth with her quick, warm tongue in a way that made him smile when he was kissing her. He held her a little tighter. Yeah, kissing Blair was all right.

She pulled away and pressed her cheek into his bare chest. "I love you, Nate," she whispered quietly into his damp skin. "I've always loved you." Blair's entire body felt like wax after it had melted and then cooled. She was rubbery, pliable.

Nate tucked his hands under her wet hair and pulled her head away from his chest so he could kiss her again. Blair was so cute and dramatic, it made him feel like he was acting in some big cheesy romance movie. Guess he'd have to forget the cotillion and hooking up with L'Wren. He couldn't leave now, not when there was all this kissing to do. Blair's lips tasted like Triscuits and vodka. They tasted nice. And she wasn't going anywhere. He could kiss her all night if he wanted to, because he wasn't going anywhere either. Knowing that made him feel satisfied and happy and psyched to kiss her even more.

Across the suite, through the steam, Serena watched their dark, wet heads come together and stay together. It really was romantic—the way their pristine white towels were wrapped so neatly around their bodies, the tender way Nate was holding Blair's head. Serena's vision began to blur and hot tears slid down her cheeks. Angry with herself for standing there gaping like an idiot, she grabbed her discarded clothes and her raspberry-colored coat from off the floor and hurried out of the suite to change in one of the hotel's lobby restrooms. She couldn't bear to watch any more.

And this is only the beginning.