The Beginning

Tess

Nic's house seemed bigger when I was here all alone. Everything felt like it echoed back at me. I didn't realize how safe I felt when he was around until he was gone. I tried to sit at the island in the kitchen and finish my paper, but snow fell in one large mushy mass off the rooftop and startled me back into the bedroom hours ago. It was more comfortable here anyway, I told myself as I struggled to find a new position for the forty-fifth time.

"That's it." I cooed to myself. I had finally met the word count and I didn't even have to sneak any hidden words in at the bottom. Though I may have rambled for most of the final paragraph. I wondered if my professor would accept Xanax as an excuse, even if I hadn't taken one since much earlier this morning.

My ambition to keep my head clear while Nicky was away outweighed my need for physical relief. If he was right and the hunt for Hannibal was on, I couldn't say whether or not he watched this house at this very moment. Perhaps he had seen Nicky leave alone and waited for his opportunity to strike.

I swallowed the thought as my hands stilled over my keyboard.

Reminding myself that I could only control myself, I refocused on my work. If I wasn't viciously murdered by our small-town terrorizer, at least I could graduate happily... right?

A breath of frustration escaped me as my phone started vibrating in my lap. Another unidentified caller. I turned my phone face down on the bed and let it ring through. Whomever was on the other end could talk to themselves. I didn't have time for threats.

A revelation furrowed my brow. Why would Hannibal want me away from Nicky? He'd gone to great lengths to wreck my car, to threaten me, to make me feel unsafe in the only place I'd ever called home. Why wouldn't he just take me or kill me like the Gregg's?

Maybe it was a part of the fun for him. Something to stir the pot of swelling emotion before he made his final move.

Another thick, semi-icy pile of snow crunched against previously fallen snow. I flinched and peered out of the frosted windows. Thank goodness for the daylight. Neither a shadow nor an outline appeared beyond them. After releasing a relaxing breath and allowing myself into a state of semi-calm, my phone began to vibrate on the nightstand.

Instead of Nicky's name on the screen, it was another unknown number. It wasn't private like it had been before. Perhaps he'd forgotten to block the number. Rather than answer, I turned it face down. As quickly as the buzzing stopped, it began again.

Frustration overtook. I snatched the phone off the table and answered, "Listen, you spineless asshole--"

"Tess?"

Nate. "What do you want?" I didn't intend for my voice to shake the way it did, nor did I expect the feeling that crept back into my heart.

"I guess you've called me worse." He chuckled lightly.

"What do you want?" I repeated the question, each word sharper than the last.

"I thought that I should check on you. I saw your wreck in the news, and Lexi said your apartment was demolished." He explained.

"That's not your concern, Nathan. I am no longer any of your business." I growled.

He sighed heavily. "I know that what I did was wrong--"

"And you picked her up?" I burst. "You picked her up, took her home and what? What happens next, Nate?"

Why did I even care?

Nate and I may have ended years ago, but I found that the sore spots on my heart had been prodded when I saw him with Lexi.

Before Nicky, I'd lost the ability to defend myself. It was nearly impossible to uphold healthy boundaries. I would have brushed it off, reminding myself that he was no longer my concern. If they wanted each other, they could have each other and there was nothing else to say.

Now that I'd been treated more exceptionally in the last week than I had in our entire three-year relationship, I better understood what I deserved and what I shouldn't have accepted. It made me ask one simple question: why? A question to which I never sought an answer.

Enough rage coursed through me that I felt as if I could take down a pack of hyenas on my own. Like the beam of sunlight that streams through the magnifying glass, I aimed my fierce emotion at Nate.

Maybe I needed to direct my anger at myself. I was the idiot who didn't blame Lexi or Nate for the shit they pulled. Instead, it was swept under the rug like all their other past misdeeds, and I held the broom.

"Are you serious, Tess? I picked her up because your new little plaything would've let her live on the street."

"Plaything?" I scoffed. "What exactly was Lexi to you? You know what? Don't even answer that."

"That's not fair." He lowered his voice.

"That's one-hundred percent fair, Nathan. I was out with her that night. She was at my bachelorette party. She snuck off to find you and you didn't think twice."

"I was drunk."

"So was I! And you didn't get a video of me getting my dick sucked, did you? You didn't have to watch me fuck your best friend in the bathroom of a strip club."

Silence hung in the air.

"What? You don't have anything to say now?" I inquired.

Nate clicked his tongue. "You're just making some really questionable decisions right now. It seems like someone else is making them for you."

"That's what this is about?" A humorless laugh escaped me. "You're upset that I'm being taken care of by someone who isn't you? Or is that you think I don't deserve it?"

"The De La Cruz's are a small-town mafia, Tess, and associating yourself with the likes of them will come back to bite you in the ass. Dale came to work the other day with two broken hands and a gash down the front of his head. He's out of work for the next two months."

My breath caught.

Nicky was there the night that Dale grabbed me. He looked like he was ready to hurt Dale right then and there.

Nothing could've stopped him from doing it behind my back.

My heart sank in my chest and my throat tightened.

"Now you don't have anything to say?" Nate fed my line back to me.

"Nicky has never made me question his loyalty. He's never made me feel ugly or out of place. He didn't propose to me with no intention of actually marrying me. And he didn't ruin my relationship with someone who was supposed to be my best friend. You don't like him because he's setting boundaries, Nate, and he's helping me understand mine." I took a soothing breath. "Lexi isn't welcome here because she tried the same things with him that she did with you. You know what he did? He chose me."

"You've only been with that man for a week."

"And he still chose me. Something you couldn't do after three years together." Outrage that once coursed through me had dwindled to understanding. And having said all that I needed, I ended the phone call.