Word count: 90,179'
18+
"Oh my sweet angel, did you really think I was going to give it to you so easily? Anyways, when I let you cum, it's going to be from my cock, not my fingers."
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We lay in bed just holding each other until Cillian sighs heavily, "We need to get cleaned up" He mumbles, "I don't think I can stand" I admit, he chuckles and rolls onto me boxing me in "Guess I did my job right then" He smugly says, "Was it good for you?" I ask quietly, I have never once given a fuck if I have given someone pleasure, but for him? I wanted to make sure he enjoyed every damn second.
"You're perfect Willow, it was perfect, trust me" He smiles before kissing my nose, I watch as he stands up before holding his hand out for me, I take it as he helps me to my feet, with wobbly knees I follow him into the bathroom watching as he turns the bath on letting it fill up, he holds my waist and picks me up sitting me on the cold counter, I shive as the marble feels like ice against my skin.
He takes his time as he looks over my body intensely, his fingers tracing every small scar, lump and bump I have on me, I should feel insecure, and embarrassed, but he looks at me as if I'm nothing less than perfect. His eyes meet mine again as he smiles softly, kissing me quickly before turning around and shutting the water off when it's full enough.
He tests the water nodding to himself before turning back to me, he picks me up and carries me to the bath before setting me in gently, I hum in satisfaction as the warm water engulfs me like a hug, closing my eyes I relax my muscles, I feel the water rise as he gets in behind me pulling my back into his chest.
He picks up his phone from beside the bath and holds it in front of my face opening his camera roll, "Pick a picture" He says with a groggy voice, at first I'm confused but scroll through the multiple pictures of us, it's only then do I notice pictures of me he's taken each time we've been together, I want to ask him how he's so sneaky about it but I stay on the task at hand.
Eventually, I landed on a picture of us kissing with the sunset behind us, it's from our 4th date, we had gone on a picnic in a forest, and we had even found a waterfall. "This one" I smile recalling the memory, I watch as he screenshots it so it goes to the bottom of his camera roll before opening Instagram, "A bet's a bet hmm?" I hear him smile through his words.
He picks the picture and writes a caption in the area "My one and only" Before tagging my profile and posting it "Let the world burn" I chuckle as he turns his phone off, it still amazes me how much the media care about our personal lives, there are so many other things happening in this world that we should be paying attention too.
He wraps his other arm around me as I lean my head against his chest, his heart beating calmly "How am I supposed to get those birds home?" I ask out of the blue, my head bounces slightly as he softly laughs, "I'll hire a truck to move them for you angel".
Satisfied with the answer I close my eyes and relax more into his embrace, silence fills the bathroom but it's comforting, if you had of told me a year ago that I'd be happy and comfortable in a man's arms I would have laughed at you, and yet the only people I trust in this fucked up world are men.
"My birth giver wasn't a good mother" I randomly say, Cillian doesn't speak but his thumb softly runs across my stomach as if to let me know he's listening "She forced me out on the streets, to beg for money to fuel her drug addiction, her and my uncle, they smoked, swallowed or shot up anything they could get their hands on".
"if I didn't save a little cash to get food I would have starved, all they cared about was getting high... they..." I try to continue but a painful lump in my throat forms, "You don't need to continue angel" Cillian says as he holds me tighter, "No, I do, because you might not want me anymore..." I explain, and his body stiffens with my words.
"They, assaulted me, in more ways than one. She would, encourage him and force things inside of me... to teach me a lesson" I trail off watching the bath water ripple at any small movements made "When I was 14, they put me on the streets to, make money another way. I wasn't getting enough from begging, people didn't care if a teenager was homeless, well, they didn't care as much as they did when I was a child"
"A teenager is a child Willow" He responds, "Not to them I wasn't, I was an adult in their eyes, and I had to make money the way adults do" I sigh trying my best to beat around the bush, "Wha-" He begins but I cut him off "Pimped me out is the word I guess, sounds better than selling myself to dirty men".
"I would save the money from these... jobs, and I'd get tested every week, I was terrified of getting a disease that would kill me, I was terrified of getting pregnant, I was just terrified in general. If I wasn't being used at 'home' I was being used on the streets"
"Oh baby" He whispers as one of his hands moves from around my waist to caress my face, "The last night I was with them, they told me that they had sold me to some drug kingpin that was in charge of selling drugs to most of the town, I had heard storys about him on the streets, much older man, in his 50's at least. Rumour was that he had killed any woman that didn't obey him. I knew I couldn't let myself fall any more than I already had".
"You ran?" He asks oh so innocently... "Eventually" I reply, I can sense the confusion on his face "They had asked me to shoot them up for the last time before he picked me up, I put more heroin in the needle than they were used to, the plan was to let them overdose, but they didn't, not enough anyways. Once my uncle realised what I had done he pulled a gun out on me and tried to shoot me"
"I panicked, and threw a shoe at his head, it surprised him enough so that he had dropped the gun, I took my chance and picked up the tie that was originally around their arms, I ran to him and slipped it over his neck. I placed my feet on his shoulders and pulled it as tight as I could, I remember crying, trembling in fear, fear that he would retaliate, fear that someone would walk in, fear that my birth giver would come to her senses and kill me with her bare hands, but eventually he stopped fighting, stopped struggling, stop breathing. Then, I did the same to her"
We sit in silence, I expect him to blow up any second, scream at me, tell me to get out of his life and to never come back, expect him to call the police and send me away, I mean, after all, I'd deserve it.
I had killed two people, I had let countless men fuck me for spare change, and Cillian deserved someone better than me.
"You are the strongest fucking person I know angel, nothing you say could make me leave or love you any less"
