Fallin' Into You

6

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Kayla's POV

After Monica let everything out last night, I stayed up with her as long as she needed. We ended up falling asleep wrapped around each other on my bed. When the sun peeked through the blinds, she was the first to wake up. Her hair was a little messy, but she still looked... well, like her. There were faint streaks from all the crying, but she tried to act like it was all good as she stretched and started gathering her stuff to leave.

"I'm sorry for just dropping in like that," she said, her voice a little hoarse. She pushed some of her braids back. "I didn't know where else to go."

"Mon, it's fine. You don't have to apologize," I told her, trying to keep my voice steady, even though my chest felt tight. "You know you can come to me anytime."

She gave me this small smile, but it didn't reach her eyes. "Yeah, well... I guess I pick better friends than I do crushes, huh?"

That one sentence hit me harder than it should've. "Friends." Hearing it stung, especially because, to me, Monica was so much more than that. But I couldn't say anything. Not now. Not when she was still dealing with everything. I forced a smile and said, "Well, hey, at least you got one thing going for you."

She chuckled, but it was soft, almost hollow. "Thanks, Kayla. Seriously." She paused like she wanted to say more, then shook her head. "I'll see you later."

Watching her walk out of my room, I felt this wave of sadness. I wanted to grab her and tell her how I really felt, but it wasn't the right time. I couldn't do that to her—not when she was still hurting over Alicia.

The next couple of weeks flew by, but things finally started feeling a bit normal again. Monica got back into our usual routine. Skylar was, as always, there with her goofy jokes and hugs, doing everything she could to cheer Monica up. And T.J., who'd been MIA for a minute with Winter, started coming around more. I guess he realized he'd been slipping and wanted to hang out again.

I did my best to be there for Monica. We had more sleepovers, stayed up late watching movies, and laughed like old times. Anything to keep her mind off Alicia. But, honestly, with every passing day, my feelings for her kept growing. It was like this big, heavy secret I was carrying around that got harder to ignore.

One night, after a study session at Sky's, Monica and I ended up back at my dorm, chilling on the couch. She leaned her head on my shoulder, and I couldn't help but feel this warmth spread through me. But at the same time, it hurt. How could something that felt so good be so... painful? I wanted to say something, to finally tell her what had been eating me up inside, but the words got stuck in my throat.

"Thanks for being there for me, Kay," she murmured, her voice low. "I don't know how I would've handled all this without you."

I swallowed hard. "You don't have to thank me for that," I said softly. "That's what friends are for, right?"

Friends. That word again. It felt like I was constantly trying to remind myself of my place in her life, but it wasn't working. I nodded, hoping she didn't notice the tightness in my voice. "Yeah... friends."

Later that night, lying in bed, I stared at the ceiling, my mind racing. I replayed every moment we'd spent together, every time she smiled at me, laughed at my jokes, or leaned in just a little too close. The feelings inside me were building up, like a pressure cooker ready to burst. I knew I couldn't hold it in much longer, but what if telling her everything ruined us? What if it made things weird?

The storm of emotions brewing inside me was getting harder to control. I was stuck between wanting to be the friend she needed and the person who just wanted to grab her and kiss her senseless. But for now, I had to play it cool. I had to be the one who kept it together... even if I felt like I was falling apart.