Our Cosmic Love (MPS Sequel)

05| Memories of Last Night

CHAPTER FIVE: MEMORIES OF LAST NIGHT

Julie

There's something that is triggered in me and my whole body welcomes Charlie and his touch and I can't help but kiss him back. He pulls me closer, his hand on my lower back and my arms wrap around his waist. I've never felt this type of hunger for anyone before and though I know I should stop, I simply cannot. I want him so bad.

As we continue to kiss Charlie pulls me alongside him and he walks forward, causing me to walk backwards and we come to a halt when I feel my back hit the side of my car. I break our kiss for a moment and open the door to the back seat. Charlie brings his hand up to the back of my head so I don't hit it as we climb into the car. I look up at Charlie as I lay on the seat and he dips his head down to plant a kiss on my lips. I can feel as he begins to pull himself away but I can't help but bite his bottom lip to pull him back down to kiss me again and he does. I can feel as his hand travels up to cup my cheek for a moment and travels down to my neck and then he begins to play with the string that is tying my sweater closed at my chest. Charlie's kisses have now traveled down to my jaw and to my neck and I can't help the moan that has escaped my mouth. Charlie tugs at the string until my sweater is untied and pulls it off at my shoulder revealing the white spaghetti strap that I am wearing underneath. I bring my hand up to his shirt to begin to unbutton it when suddenly Charlie stops kissing me and pulls away. I look up at him, confused, and he grabs my sweater and pulls it back up to cover my shoulder. He shows a mix of conflicted emotions as he pulls away, gets out of the back seat, opens the passenger door and sits down. It takes my body a full minute to register what just happened before I get up and go back to the driver's seat.

The awkward tension that we first started off with doesn't compare to the one that is happening right now. I'm left confused with Charlie's actions and my soaking wet clothes don't help with this heavy feeling.

"What the hell just happened," I finally blurt out when I couldn't take it any more.

"We shouldn't," is all he says in a low voice.

I scoff. "Are you kidding me right now?"

"I don't want to make you do something I know you'll regret later."

"You weren't making me do anything."

"You would've regretted it later."

"So what?"

"So I don't want that," he exclaims, his voice stern.

I scoff. "You're unbelievable you know that? First you do all these things at school that make me think you're interested and now you won't even fuck me."

I can see his jaw clench from the side of his face once the words leave my mouth and he turns his head so we can lock eyes. "In case you haven't realized it yet, I wasn't going to fuck you back there. I was going to make love to you."

My breath hitches. Why does he have to do this? Why does he have to tug on my heartstrings? This could've been purely physical but he has to take it too far. I look away, my eyes suddenly stinging and my heart racing so fast that I can feel it coming up my throat. We're quiet, for what seems like forever and although the tension has eased, the rain hasn't. It pours hard against my car and all I wish is for it to end so that Charlie and I are no longer at this close proximity.

"I'm sorry," Charlie says after a while. I glance over at him. "You're right, I've been pushing you too far so we can have these...moments, I guess. I can't..." He lets out a deep sigh. "I can't just fuck you and be done. I'd want you forever."

I ignore the tenderness in his voice when he says that last word and say, "No you're right. I would have regretted it. I'm glad we didn't."

We're quiet for a moment before Charlie says, "I feel like we just crossed a line to no return. Just when things were getting better between us."