Unrequited Love For the Ages

Guilty!

Hands up, I'm guilty—
I was an addict, you see,
Addicted to the way you looked at me.

Crashing out, crossing imaginary lines,
I always craved a glimpse of those godforsaken eyes.
Anticipations, frustrations, my fixation,
And all the waiting for when you would simply speak to me—
Like a fiend, you were my ecstasy.

I used you up, like I was high on drugs.
Was it real? Was it lust?
Would I ever have been enough?
Was it truly just a one-sided crush?
Didn't matter; I still injected myself with your fleeting touch.

Coming down, I wonder—does a dealer really care about anyone but themselves?
You left me to dust on your highest shelf.
Oh, I know, I really should've called the cops on myself.

And I'd confess, for a while, you made it all worthwhile.
I guess I was in denial, or maybe I was just a child.
But man, I can still see that wild, Hollywood smile.
Now it's all turned vile in this cold turkey trial,
Trying to move on from you and your wicked beguile.

Struck me with your lightning,
Spewing out my sacred words—so much useless writing.
Waste of my time, what a foolish crime.
Does anyone else here care you're a criminal in hiding?

Running—well, you fled,
Waited till I bled.
Maybe if I had worn a pretty dress,
I would've been your best.

Hooked on a boy, could've, should've picked a better toy.
I try to act coy,
But I need to know the damage.
Am I free? Or are they going to arrest me?
What's the charge? Who's at large?

'Cause I think I'm just guilty of a love I imagined,
Addicted to this illusion of a romance that never happened—
My favorite hallucination,
Took the wrong medication.

You messed me all up, left me to dry and sober up.
Wow, you really do suck.
Just let me be, 'cause don't you see,
Hands up, you're the one guilty!