𝐌𝐈𝐊𝐄'𝐒 𝐏𝐎𝐕
── .✦ Eddie shoves me down into the seat with a very serious look on his face. He gives me a "do-not-move-under-any-circumstances" look, and leans back into the chair across from me. We sit in silence, and I start to sweat a little as Eddie stares at me.
"Give the kid a break, Eds. He's probably not educated well enough on this." Steve appears out of nowhere, with Robin trailing behind him. It was no surprise, really. Steve latched onto Eddie, and Robin latched onto Steve. Normally my sis would be here too, but she's busy with some random job interview.
"Steve. I can't take it anymore." Eddie replies, still keeping the intense eye contact with me. Steve pulls up two chairs, and they both sit down next to Eddie, opposite of me. "He needs to know this now. Did you see them yesterday?"
"Hello, I'm right here! So, um...what are we talking about?" I interrupt before Steve speaks again. Steve turns his head towards me.
"Oh, you sweet child. We will help you." Robin reaches across the fairly small table and ruffles my hair.
"Robin, you aren't apart of this. You have absolutely no idea about men and sex, so you can just go in the corner." Steve points to a corner to my right, and she makes a sad face before following his instructions.
"What was that about sex?" My voice shakes as Eddie slams his hands down onto the table.
"Listen, Mike. We, ahem, have noticed some things."
"Uh huh."
"And those things, well, uh, can lead to, um, other things."
"Very descriptive."
"Shut up, okay Mike? This is hard to explain for your little, innocent brain." I roll my eyes.
"If you are talking about sex, I already know all of that stuff."
"This isn't about normal sex, Mike. This is about gay sex." Steve interjects. "And we thought, who better to teach you then us?"
"Because you guys are gay? Does that mean you've had sex?"
"Enough with the questions, okay Micheal? This is serious." Steve leans back in his chair, giving me the stink eye as Eddie continues. "You need to know how to-"
"Blah, blah, I already know, blah, blah, we're done here." I leave my chair and head to the door, but Steve grabs my arm and yanks me back.
"Robin, you're on door duty. Make sure he doesn't escape." After that, I had to endure hours and hours of torture. At least that's what it felt like. I've made a run for it about 4 times, each time unsuccessful. I start internally screaming when they brought out the visual charts and posters and everything.
"Someone kill me now." I groan.
