Your Favorite

45

~NY New Apartment~
they next day.

i used my key to walk inside onikas apartment. andrea laid on the couch, stretched out while watching tv and eating snacks. she simply waved at me as i spoke, heading to onikas room. not gonna lie i was scared.

i'm sure she's still pissed from yesterday and to make matters worse i didn't come here last night as i was supposed to. it's just that i got a little tipsy with solange so i stayed home after being dropped off.

the only problem is getting onika to believe me.

"nika.."

i peeked in the room to see her back towards the door as she was bunched up under the covers. the tv played lowly and i took my shoes off to get in the bed with her. thankfully she's still sleeping.

"i love you." i leaned over her body and kissed her cheek before cuddling into her back. she had to be knocked out because she didn't move a muscle. literally had to make sure she was still breathing.

i wrapped my arm to the front of her and rubbed her stomach lightly until i found myself dozing off too.

"so you just sitting around this nigga?!"

"no nika, my mama invited him."

"that shit not making sense to me. if she knows y'all divorced, why the fuck-"

"because she thinks we'll get back together."

"and you want me to be comfortable with that?..... yea alright." she gave a bitter chuckle and nod, getting off the couch to her room. i stayed where i was dropping my head back while groaning. this is stressful.

i knew she wouldn't understand it nor try to. her mind is made up and because i didn't come to her right after, she's livid times ten. but i wasn't giving up so i went and followed behind her.

"nika..."

"bye bey. cause you knew the shit was fucked up, you didn't even come back over here last night. that shit is weird and i'm sick of it."

"i was drunk nika, i couldn't."

"so you went and got drunk with the dude?" she gave me an amused look, whipping her head my way. i whined only a little knowing that would piss her off even more. "you sure you got dropped off home and that was it?!"

"yes nika."

"bullshit. if you was drunk and you know he be pushing up on you, how you so sure?! ya motha wouldn't try to stop it cause she want that shit!"

"i wasn't completely drunk, i was only tipsy. i was aware."

"i'm tired of talking to you."

i huffed feeling my attitude come through because of hers. now i'm getting pissed of cause she won't listen to me. why can't she believe me?

"if anything happened i would have told you onika, you know this. i'm not lying to you about anything."

"i never said you were lying, i said i'm tired of talking to you."

"so you want me to leave?" i softened up. she's never made me leave, ever. i'll probably cry if she told me to leave her house. "nika..."

"i don't care what you do bey." she grumbled going in the bathroom. i didn't like the way she sounded, so i followed her...of course. first i knocked on the door not getting an answer, so i walked in.

she stood in the mirror with tears falling down her face, her nose and eyes red. i felt something inside me drop. it was a feeling i'd never had before. like a different type of guilt.

"please don't cry."

her hands shook as she brought them to her face, wiping her tears. i was scared. it looked like she would crash out from being upset, and i didn't want her to do that. something else has to be on her mind.

"onika-"

"no, don't touch me."

i tried touching her shoulder but she shrugged me off. she stopped every tear from sliding down her face, sniffling in the process. but she didn't want any sympathy. her hair was pulled from the bun, and she turned on the shower.

"can you- can you step out please?"

"nika no, you're shaking."

"because i'm pissed off beyoncé. let me calm down!"

"is it that serious onika?"

"don't ask me that cause i've never asked you that."

"onika i didn't do anything with that man!"

"that's not the point! and you pissing me off more trynna make it seem like that's the fucking point! it's not!" she started her way to me and i walked backwards out of shock. "you told me you would be with your mom and your sister!! did you mention him?!"

we stopped walking in the middle of her room. her chest heaved from how upset she was. i stayed silent out of fear.

"hello?!?"

"no, i didn't mention him. but-"

"ain't no but!! you lied to me! then you get caught up and cats got your tongue?! how you expected me to feel?! and all of sudden you got tipsy to the point where you couldn't come back to me?! beyoncé i- i needed you..."

her eyes filled with the thickest tears i've ever seen. she didn't wipe them this time. she let them fall, down her face and to her neck, soaking her shirt. i wanted to touch her...

"i needed you and you didn't come to me." she shook like she would break down and i caught her before she could. seeing her cry this way was making me emotional. i'd never felt so guilty in my life, like i regretted my actions times ten.

my mission was to never hurt her. and she's hurt.

her arms wrapped around me tight, she stuffed her face in my neck and her tears coated my skin. she was shaking like there was so much on her chest that needed to be released. these tears weren't from this situation.

she really needed me last night.

"i'm sorry i wasn't there for you."

"what happened?" andrea stood at the door before coming inside. she dropped down to the floor, wrapping her arms around the both of us for extra comfort. i rested my head on top of onikas.

what could be going on in her head?

______

little sumn.