{The trigger may impact those with experience if anyone wants to read this story.}
Making Progress in Recovering from Self-Hatred during Hardship Time
🎵 My baby, I feel your pain; it's time to let it go. 🎵
As the wind blows, a flock of ducks strides through a green grass field.
The wind blows my hair out as I scent fresh and herbal aromas.
🎵 you cannot hold your breath at all times.🎵
While watching my two under-three-year-old kids play laughingly outdoors, my handsome husband sings, smiles, and performs on a tiny guitar beside me. I wear a casual, loose, long sweatshirt, short shirt, and short ripple jeans. I sit cross-legged with tangerine flip sandals on the plaid picnic floor.
With my red-tinted sunglasses, I blush and glance flirtatiously at my husband, who wears a backward cap on his neat, wavy, a bit greasy brown hair. He is clothed in a Hawaiian button-down shirt, a short swimsuit, and sunglasses.
🎵 Your beauty is indisputable. 🎵
My heart glows as my eyes are deeply crazy locked with him as he sings and plays the guitar serenely. I can't believe I've been married for four years. I honestly love him so much.
I wonder how blessed I am to survive.
I am a lighting blue
🎵 When you went through the most challenging hour of your life, my heart pained out for you.🎵
Memory floods back.
In college, as an introverted fluid, I concealed my identity so that I could fit in with society without experiencing any bullying or prejudice. I changed who I am, too. I have many friends with whom I can easily interact. Once, they invited me to join their group when I tasted upper class through a friend. They were unaware of my background or how my family was represented. Even though I allowed my parents to visit me but kept my family members away, I did not accept to recognize my siblings as family members. My obsession was telling everyone I was the only child in my family. My growth habits profited from lying about how I learned, like feeding my dopamine addiction with pills. I did not know how to use white lies as a good reason. It was gone, and I forgot where I stood on my deflection test. Admittedly, my hidden guilt weighed heavily on my anxiety and overthinking while I emanated pleasure from lying. Was I being manipulated? However, I learned how to save my face graciously. If I told everyone, I would lose my benefits, and I would be terrified and sick to my stomach.
In the hallway of the pass, I bumped into a handsome dark brown mohawk boy who was muscular. He was confused and stared at me while I was terrified but timid. My first impression was when he said to me sweetly, his hand gently rubbing my cheek, "I'm sorry. I accidentally bumped into your arm. "Are you OK?" I became closer to him than I had been previously. He seemed charismatic and gentle. Despite my unwillingness to tell him about my background, my heart opened up and became warmer with him at the beginning of a new beginning.
I am a lighting blue
Since middle school, my life has taken a different turn that you would not like. I was grappling with unhealed wounds in silence, drastically altering my path. I knew you empathized with what I was going through. I missed magnetic memories of history. Back in my youth, I treasured moments with my sibling and my brother. We were kinship in the family; they stood by me through thick and thin. I would never forget a tumbledown experience I had once in my life. I remember the horrific incident.
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I am a Blue (series)
PoesíaA blue character is among ordinary people from the rest of the world.