One -Shot Collection- Sabriel

One-Shot 2

The bitter Kansas wind was blowing hard outside, shaking the trees in the bunker, but Sam heard nothing. The world seemed silent since Gabriel's death, that unbearable sound of silence, the absence of such a vibrant presence, made the pain deepen even more. Sam looked at the glass of whiskey in his hands, trying to find some relief in the amber bottom, but there was nothing there, just emptiness, just longing.

"I feel used, but I still miss you..."

No matter how much time passed, the void that Gabriel left did not diminish, no matter how much he tried to convince himself that this was right, that Gabriel had fulfilled his role in the battle against Michael, the archangel's absence was consuming him.

He remembered Gabriel's cheeky smile, his sarcastic jokes, the times he could snap Sam out of his own dark thoughts, even if it was just for a few minutes, but now, all that was left was absence and longing.

Sam closed his eyes, trying to force the memories away, but they came harder, like an avalanche.

"I hate you; I love you; I hate this, I want you..."

Sam hated how much Gabriel still occupied his thoughts, hated how much his heart still ached for someone who, deep down, he knew he shouldn't have gotten attached to, but he couldn't help it, Gabriel had infiltrated his life and in his heart in a way Sam would never expect.

He hated that even after everything, he still loved him. And he hated the fact that love wasn't enough to bring him back.

Meanwhile, Dean watched Sam from the bunker hallway, leaning against the wall with a worried expression. Castiel was at his side, his brow slightly furrowed, as if trying to understand what was going on in Sam's mind. Since Gabriel's death, Sam was different, more closed, as if he carried an invisible weight that was crushing him.

— He doesn't sleep. — Murmured Dean, with his eyes fixed on his brother's lonely figure — He barely eats either, he just sits there, with that damn glass in his hand, as if he's waiting for something that will never happen.

Castiel nodded, worry evident in his blue eyes, he felt Sam's pain, even if he didn't fully understand it, he knew grief was a heavy burden, but there was something more to Sam, something deeper and darker.

— I see him praying sometimes, but... he's not praying for help, it seems more like he's... talking to someone who can't respond. said Castiel, his voice low.

Dean let out a frustrated sigh as he rubbed the back of his neck trying to put the pieces together.

— I don't know what to do anymore, Cas. I've lost count of how many times I've tried to talk to him, but he shuts down. He's always been like this, but... this is different.

Castiel remained silent for a moment, his eyes never leaving Sam. He could feel the depth of the emptiness that consumed the hunter, but he didn't know how to fill that hole.

— He's grieving for more than just Gabriel. — said Castiel, his voice conveyed ancient wisdom — There is more than grief, there is hope, regret and something else that he doesn't want to admit.

Dean looked at him, his eyebrows furrowed.

—Regret? For what?

Castiel looked away briefly, hesitating before responding.

— I'm not sure, but I feel like Sam has a deeper soul, something that's eating away at him.

Dean unclenched his fists, he hated feeling helpless and seeing his brother wasting away in front of him and not being able to do anything, it was unbearable. Dean watched Sam once again, feeling the distance between them growing each day.