SKYFALL, Johnny Kavanagh

Same boys, same excuses

Maeve's Point of View

I didn't go to school the next day.
Or the day after.
I was exhausted, both physically and mentally, and was in too much pain to consider showing up for school.

On the third day Shannon decided to speak after I – once again – refused to go downstairs to have dinner. "You're going to have to face him, you know. He's not buying your I'm on my period excuses anymore." She said with a worried glance.

"Do you think he'd prefer discovering that I'm actually sick because I got dragged like a rag doll?" I questioned.

"I think Joey would have preferred you called him instead of taking my dad all on your own. I know I would have." Shannon snapped, her tone laced with frustration.
She was still mad at me for lying to her, and I didn't blame her.

She'd figured it out pretty quickly after walking in on me that day, passed out in bed with a black eye. It didn't take long for her to realize that I hadn't called Joey like I'd promised.
And, of course, she blackmailed me into spilling the details, threatening to rat me out to him if I didn't.

So, I told her everything.
Well, almost everything.
I left out one small detail.
The scar.

I still couldn't bring myself to look at it, but just knowing it was there hurt more than any punch my uncle had ever aimed at me.
Another scar to add on to the others.
The ones on my back.
The one on my neck.
The ones on my inner thigh.
And now this one on my lower stomach.
I hated them.
Each and every last one was a reminder of something I wanted to forget.

"Yeah, well. What Joey doesn't know won't hurt him." I replied.

"You're going back to school tomorrow." She reminded me as if I could possibly forget.

"Yes, Friday is a school day, Shan." I confirmed.

"You've been hiding in our room for the past three days, Joey knows something is wrong. One look at your beaten-up face and he'll put two and two together."

"Make up." I responded with a smirk. "The answer to all of my prayers."

"And how is that going to hide the swelling?" she retorted.

"It's barely there anymore, it has gone down a lot in the last three days." I shot back. "If he says anything I'll just tell him that my face is bit swollen from my period. He'll get grossed out and won't ask anything else."

"You really do have an answer to everything." She told me blankly.

"Never doubt my wisdom, especially when it comes to boys. They're all the same." I sighed. "Except for whoever you have your eyes on, I'm sure." I winked at her.

"I told you, I didn't see anyone that day."

"Alright, alright. I'll stop." I knew I'd pushed Shannon far enough and teasing her about some non-existent crush wasn't going to get me out of this situation.

"Are you sure the make-up is going to be enough?" She asked worriedly. "What if someone at school notices?"

"No one is going to see anything." I assured her. "And if they do, I'll just come up with an excuse, like I've always done."
The best lies were built on a kernel of truth.
I could say I tripped on something and got knocked into the table.
It wasn't a complete lie—I had been shoved into a table.
But Joey? He'd see right through it.
He'd ask questions I couldn't answer, demand to see the rest of me—my arms, my ribs.
He'd find the bruises.

So, the period excuse would just have to do.

Later, when Shannon went to sleep, I checked my phone.
I had checked it every night since Monday.
Once again I tapped on Johnny's contact.

Boy Wonder
No new messages.

Well, it seemed my message had worked.
Maybe the way I had acted towards him the other day had finally managed to push him away.
But why do I feel dread instead of relief?
I turned off my phone and put it back on the charger.
Just stop thinking, Maeve.

Niamh and Gibsie had both called on Tuesday to check in.
I'd told them I was sick and would be back at school soon.

Aoife and Casey had texted too, asking if things were okay after the fight on Sunday.
I hadn't answered.
Sunday.
I'd almost forgotten about that disaster.
I needed to talk to Joey.
I had been avoiding that conversation too long.
I needed to know if he agreed with them.

And if he did, I had to change his mind.
Did he not remember what happened to Darren?

The thought of him was like a punch to the gut, one that hadn't dulled over the years.
He had been everything to me— my confidant, my best friend, the one person I thought would always have my back.
And then he was gone.
No explanation, no goodbye, just...gone.
Forcing a younger me into a promise he had no right asking for.
I hated him for it, but at the same time, I couldn't help but wonder if he'd had the right idea.
Maybe leaving is the only way to survive this place.

But I wasn't Darren.
I couldn't just leave, my cousins were my only family.
I couldn't abandon Joey, Shannon, Tadhg, Ollie or little Sean.
But I knew I had a little less than one year left before I turned eighteen, and – as soon as I did – my uncle would throw me out of the house.
The original plan was that me and Joey – who had turned eighteen this last Christmas – would get jobs and try to get the kids out of the house with us.

But the more time passed, the more that plan was starting to look like a fantasy.
It wouldn't be right to take Sean away from his Mam, and Marie wouldn't let the rest of her children go without a fight.
The only real plan I had was to wait until I could get my hands on my parents' life insurance.
If we got the authorities involved after that, maybe we could prove how unfit Marie was, how dangerous my uncle was.
Maybe we could get custody.
The insurance money could keep us afloat for a good while, at least.

But now they wanted me to call the authorities? After enduring all this time.
No.
I only had one year left before I could get us all out together.
If they were called now, everyone – me included – would go into the foster system, where Darren had been raped for months.
At least my uncle spared us that one suffering, I wasn't going to let anyone do that to my cousins.
They had already suffered enough.

And when it came down to it, I wouldn't let Joey walk away from us like Darren did.
He didn't get to abandon me too.
I wouldn't let him.