Embers of Hope// Hyunlix

Chapter - 19

Felix sat alone in his office, his fingers tracing absent patterns on the surface of his desk. The quiet hum of the city outside did nothing to drown out the thoughts swirling in his mind. Hyunjin's fragile, tear-streaked face from last night haunted him. The way Hyunjin had trembled, how his voice wavered when he spoke—it all pierced through Felix's heart like a knife.

He had been thinking about their past more and more lately. It was something he had tried to bury for so long, convincing himself that his anger and distance were justified. But now, as he watched Hyunjin break down in front of him, all of Felix's past defenses felt hollow and meaningless.

Felix leaned back in his chair, staring up at the ceiling as the memories flooded back. The incident from years ago, the one that had shattered them both—Hyunjin's supposed involvement in the girl's death. At the time, Felix had been convinced. He had walked into that room and seen the scene, the blood, the chaos, and then Hyunjin standing there. It had been easier to believe the worst, easier to let his anger take over than to ask for the truth.

But deep down, even then, Felix had known the truth. He had realized long ago that someone like Hyunjin could never be capable of such a horrific act. Hyunjin, with his soft heart and gentle nature, wasn't someone who would ever hurt another soul.

Yet, Felix had been afraid to accept that fact. Afraid because it would mean facing his own guilt—guilt for abandoning Hyunjin, for pushing him away, for punishing him when he had done nothing wrong. And now, after everything they had been through, Felix was starting to realize just how deeply he had hurt the one person who had always stood by him.

He rubbed a hand across his face, his chest tightening with regret. How could he have been so blind? So stubborn? The signs were all there—Hyunjin's quiet suffering, his attempts to reach out, his patience. And Felix had ignored it all, letting his anger guide his actions instead of listening to his heart.

There had been moments—fleeting, painful moments—where Felix had almost reached out, almost apologized. But fear held him back. Fear of being wrong. Fear of admitting that he had been the one at fault. And worst of all, fear that even if he apologized, it might be too late to fix what had been broken between them.

Felix clenched his fists, his jaw tight as the memories of those years flooded him. He had been so cold to Hyunjin, keeping him at a distance, shutting him out when all Hyunjin wanted was to be close. And now, Hyunjin was in more pain than ever—hurt in a way that Felix couldn't even begin to understand.

"I was so wrong," Felix muttered under his breath, his voice heavy with the weight of his regret. "I treated him so harshly..."

The image of Hyunjin curled up on the sofa, crying into a pillow, flashed through his mind again, and Felix's heart ached. He wanted to protect him, to hold him, to make up for every terrible thing he had done. But how could he ever make up for the years of pain he had caused?

Felix had thought that keeping his distance was for the best—that maybe if he didn't allow himself to get too close, he wouldn't hurt Hyunjin again. But now, it was clear that distancing himself had been the worst mistake of all. Hyunjin needed him. He had always needed him.

A part of Felix was afraid—afraid that Hyunjin might never fully trust him again, that the damage was irreparable. But another part of him knew he couldn't run from this any longer. He couldn't keep pretending that their relationship hadn't been broken because of his actions. He had to face it, had to admit that he had been wrong.

And Hyunjin deserved to hear that from him.

With a sigh, Felix pushed himself up from his chair, his heart heavy but determined. It was time to stop hiding from the truth. He had to make things right. He didn't know if Hyunjin would forgive him, but he owed him an apology—a real one.

Felix walked to the full glass window, staring out at the skyline as the sun began to set, painting the sky with soft hues of pink and gold. Somewhere, out there, Hyunjin was probably wondering if Felix cared. He probably thought that Felix was still angry, still blaming him for something that had never been his fault.

But Felix wasn't angry anymore. He was just filled with regret, and he needed to let Hyunjin know that.

He took a deep breath, the weight of his past mistakes heavy on his shoulders, but for the first time in a long while, Felix felt like he was ready to take responsibility for them.

Hyunjin deserved that much from him.

The following morning was quieter than usual. Hyunjin hadn't gotten out of bed, and Felix noticed how much more fragile he seemed these days. He watched as Hyunjin curled under the covers, his face barely visible beneath the blanket.

Felix sat on the edge of the bed, unsure of what to say, unsure if he even had the right to disturb the peace that Hyunjin had found in sleep. But his mind was racing. He had to speak with him, had to find a way to fix this—whatever "this" was between them.

"Hyunjin..." Felix whispered softly, reaching out.

Hyunjin stirred, blinking slowly as his eyes opened. His gaze met Felix's, and for a brief moment, Felix saw the raw hurt still lingering behind Hyunjin's tired expression. The pain was there, just below the surface, carefully hidden.

Felix swallowed, wanting to say something—anything—but the words stuck in his throat. He couldn't ask Hyunjin to forgive him.