Not-So-Secret

CHAPTER SEVENTY-ONE

He moaned as he touched her breast, cupping her, then gently squeezing. His gaze locked on hers once more, pleaded with his eyes.

She understood. For all they knew, this was the last time, the only time, they'd be this close. She wanted nothing more than to take off her robe, to lie down on the soft cushions and open herself to him. She wanted him inside her, she wanted...

Instead she pushed him back. There were more important things to worry about now. She'd denied herself for so long, she knew she wouldn't die, even though it felt beyond her endurance.

James's hand left her and curled into a fist. "Okay. We'll talk. I have something to tell you, too. I've made arrangements for someone to get you and Shaun. I don't know exactly how, or who, but you've got to be ready. You won't have time to take anything except the clothes on your back, but don't worry about it. You'll be safe and taken care of. If I were you, I'd be sure I was wearing that ring and any other jewellery you can get away with. It'll help later on."

"What do you mean, you've made arrangements?"

"Just listen, damn it. Do what they tell you. Don't argue. They'll take you to safety."

"Who? What are you talking about?"

He closed his eyes, then slowly opened them again. "I'm with the FBI."

She nodded as pieces of the puzzle fell neatly into place. "Thank God. I hoped. But hoping hasn't gotten me very far lately."

"You can stop hoping and start counting your blessings. Two more days. That's it. You'll be out of here."

Tears came to her eyes and her body, for some weird reason, started to shake. He was an FBI agent. A good guy. Trying to take down Jones. The whole time... "Why didn't you tell me?"

"I couldn't compromise the mission. But more important, I couldn't compromise you. If you slipped..."

"I'm not in the habit of slipping."

"I know. But he couldn't force you to say something you didn't know."

"Fair enough. But tell me something. Why were you so ugly when I came back? So mean?"

He looked away, suddenly finding great interest in her Fendi bag. "I thought if you hated me, you'd make Jones replace me as your bodyguard."

"Not that he would have listened, but why would you want that?"

He turned to her. "You don't know?"

"What?"

"Good God, woman. Can't you see what you do to me? When I'm around you, I lose all sense of proportion. I don't give a damn about saving the world, just you." He laughed. "I couldn't do anything right. That first time I had you in here, when we could finally talk, all I'd intended to do was to scare the hell out of you. Make certain you never wanted to speak to me again. You know how that ended."

"Really?"

"Yes really." He moved closer to her again, ran the back of his hand down her cheek. "You messaged me up. Always have. I didn't worry about Lee or any of Jones's other goons. You were the one who was going to get me killed."

"I don't want you killed."

He grinned. "I'm glad to hear it."

"I'm not joking, James. When this is over, I'd really like to.... You know, figure this out."

"Go on."

She met his gaze and the words became unimportant. Because she saw he knew just exactly what she meant. "Well, for one thing, I'd like to talk to you in a normal time of voice."

"Hmm."

"And I'd like to hold hands in public."

"You wild woman."

"There's more."

"Oh?"

She nodded slowly. "I'd like to make love in a bed. And be as noisy as I want."

"You? Noisy?"

"You have no idea."

"My, my."

"There's a lot you don't know about me, James Barnes."

His smile got a little crooked as his eyes softened. "There's so much I do know. You're the strongest woman I've ever met. You're incredibly resourceful. Braver than I could hope to be on my best day. Through all the hell, you've kept your humanity. Your gentleness. There isn't anyone else I'd want at my side."

That did it. She just fell apart. Tears flowed, her nose ran, he had to hold her up. It didn't stop all that quickly, either. The more he petted her hair, the more he whispered, "shh," the more she blubbered. Finally, finally, the tears slowed to a trickle and she was able to stand.

"Here."

She looked down to see that he'd grabbed a scarf. It was a Hermès, worth about five hundred dollars. She took it and blew her nose as hard as she could. When she was through, she tossed it into the back of the closet and turned to him. "I'm better now."

"Good, because we've got to go."

"No."

"It would be a real damn shame if we screwed up now."

"There's not even time for kissing?"

He shook his head. Right up until he grabbed her by the shoulders and kissed her.