Breathe Into Me

So Cynical

*Billie's POV*

"Are you sure you're good Finn?" I ask him as he gets settled in at home.

"Yeah I'm good, my head is fine and I'm not dying. I'm literally just gonna chill out today." He says plopping on the couch and turning on the tv.

I sit next to him and we watch tv in silence.

"What's going on, you're never this quiet around me..." his voice cutting through the lull of the tv.

"It's nothing." I keep my gaze focused on the tv.

"I call bullshit, but okay." He turns his attention back to the tv.

I let out a sigh. "I've been seeing someone and I dunno. She went through something really traumatic and literally just acted like it didn't phase her. It really threw me off and I'm my brain I was like 'oh she manipulates her own emotions, how can I trust her' and then I kinda walked out on her." I admit.

"Two things, you're a dumbass and people process things differently. Sometimes it takes time to process trauma, and adrenaline is a thing." He raises his brow at me, glaring in judgement.

"Yeah... I think I fucked up by walking out on her and no giving her a chance to explain things." I lean my head back against the couch. "I was such a bitch to her today."

"You saw her today?" Finneas gives me a puzzled look.

Avoiding his gaze I answer him. "She works at the hospital, she was your doctor."

"That's the woman you've been seeing?!" His jaw hits the floor.

"Why do you seem so surprised?" I playfully smack his arm.

"Dude she's so fucking nice, and actually cares about her job and the people she takes care of. But if you don't think she's good enough for you, that's your choice. Maybe take some time to figure things out and have a talk with her when you're ready." He gives me unsolicited advice.

"I hate when you're right... I'll talk to her when I'm ready." I mumble reluctantly.

"Good, hey do you wanna have a jam session sometime this week? Just chill." He asks trying to be noncommital.

"Sure, I'm off on Thursday."

~~~~

*Thursday*

I grab my backpack and head to the train station to meet up with my brother. I lean up against the concrete pylon and doodle in my sketchbook as I wait.

In the small crowd of people forming I see Addie, in a dress. She looks absolutely stunning. I wonder where she's headed off to.

I should go talk to her.

But then I stop myself, when I see Fiona with her.

I guess she does move on quick, maybe I was right about her. I turn my attention back to my sketchbook.

I get on the train without any interference from Addie, the ride on the train is another story. She sits entirely too close to me for my liking, two rows up, but I can still hear them giggling. I knew I should have brought my headphones.

~~~~

*Addie's POV*

"Thanks again for being willing to come to this with me." I tell Fiona as we head to the conference center downtown.

"Girly of course, any excuse to celebrate is a good one." She giggles a bit as we near our destination.

I know Billie is on the train too, I spotted her when we got on. She ignored me at the hospital and she's ignoring me now. I guess she really doesn't want anything to do with me, which I can respect.

"So just so you're aware it's like a medical journal award thing that I may or may not have submitted a paper for." I explain, realizing I never told her what the event was.

"That's exciting! Do you think you're going to win? What do you get if you win?" She asks.

"You know, I actually don't know. I assume some tangible plaque of some sort and hella bragging rights." I shrug my shoulders.

Two more stops to go.

I see Billie breeze past us and get off the train, she seems to be in a hurry to wherever she's going. Maybe she's in a hurry to continue ignoring me.

"How about after, we stop by this food truck nearby?" Fiona suggests sensing the tension.

"Is that even a question, I'm already hungry for it and I don't even know what it is." I groan literally so ready for this event to be over.

Next stop is ours and we're one step closer to having this stupid award thing behind us. I really hope my boss doesn't go overboard on the congratulations.

"Dude you didn't tell me, it was fancy fancy!" She gasps when she sees the venue and all of the cars lined up at the front of the conference center come into view.

"Trust me Fiona, you're fine. You look great." I give her a smile.

~~~~

*Billie's POV*

I hum to myself on the way to Finn's house. Stewing over being replaced so easily and quick. I'm done playing nice.

a/n: what are our thoughts?

what do we think Billie is gonna do?

Best way to eat potatoes anddd go!

I love you bubbies 💕💕