Under My Body

chapter nineteen

                Once everyone had finished their food at Mandy's, the energy had shifted. The earlier tension between me and Asher lingers but is pushed aside for now. I'd plastered on a smile, engaging in small talk with Dellana and Brie-Ann, but my heart wasn't in it. I could still feel Asher's eyes on me, the weight of our earlier exchange hanging heavy in the air. I couldn't shake the feeling of disappointment settling in my chest.

As we all started to gather our things, Brie-Ann and Dellana grabbed me before I could leave with Xavier. "Come on, you're riding with us," Dellana announced, looping her arm through mine.

I blink, trying to protest. "Wait, I was going to—"

"Nope. Girl time," Brie-Ann cut in, smiling sweetly as she ushered me toward their car.

Before I could fully follow Brie-Ann and Dellana, Xavier grabbed me gently by the arm, pulling me close. His lips brushed against my cheek in a soft, familiar kiss—a reassurance that he was there for me, as always. "We'll talk later, okay?" he murmured. I nodded, feeling the sting of unshed tears in my eyes, and watched him leave with the guys. Asher didn't even glance my way. Of course, he didn't.

The car ride was quiet. Too quiet. Brie-Ann drove, the faint hum of the radio filling the silence, while Dellana sat in the backseat, lost in her thoughts. I sat in the front, staring blankly out the window, watching the trees blur as we passed. Everything out there felt calm, but inside me? A storm raged.

I was upset. No, I was furious. I was more upset than I thought I could be. Seeing Asher tonight, I stupidly believed it would go differently. Maybe he would walk up to me, apologize, and admit he was wrong. I wanted him to tell me that he wanted me, wanted something real with me, or just wanted a real relationship. That the kiss we shared meant something to him. Instead, all I got was his cold, weirdly jealous attitude, suffocating the air between us. Not even a single apology.

Does he regret calling me that? Or does he just regret the kiss? Was it so terrible to kiss me?

He didn't even say sorry. Not once.

I clenched my jaw, pushing the thoughts away. I needed to stop this. I needed to be better than this. Asher isn't my person. That's it. That's the end of it.

With a heavy sigh, I leaned against the window, trying to blink away the tears welling up in my eyes. But they didn't listen. They clung to the edge, threatening to spill, and I tried desperately to keep them in. I wasn't going to cry over Asher. I wasn't. He does not deserve it. I am better than this.

Suddenly, the car swerved sharply, pulling me from my thoughts. My eyes widened at the abrupt movement. We weren't heading home anymore—we were now at the beach. Brie-Ann had pulled into the parking lot and cut the engine. She yanked the handbrake, turned off the radio, and unbuckled her seatbelt, twisting in her seat to face me.

Dellana leaned forward too, her arms resting on both our seats, staring at me with an unreadable expression. The silence hung thick, like they were waiting for me to break.

Finally, Dellana blurted out, "Did you guys have sex?"