Dying for Adam Young (Owl City fan fiction.)

Angels.

"Is she awake?" A voice asks... Becky.

"Yes. She can't respond to anything though. The nurse said." Mum replies and I hear her sobbing. They're both crying their eyes out.

She knows what I know. This is the last time. The last time I awaken and sleep again. Eternal sleep, I can manage that. I wish I could reach out to them and tell them everything I've ever wanted to tell them. All the love I want them to know I feel for them both.

"Anna, I love you. I need you to know I love every inch of you. We have been through so much and I want you to know every second we have spent together," she pauses, taking a deep, nervy breath, fighting back tears, the impossible job in a situation like this I suppose. Now she continues "every laugh we've shared, every tear we've shed together, I wouldn't trade for anything. Those seconds are what will stay with me for the rest of time." She finishes and places a hand on my forehead. A cold hand, cooling me down. Then pecks me on the check and steps back, probably allowing my mum to step forward.

Oh Becky, I love you too. So, so much.

"Hey baby." Whispers my mum.

She's taking deep breathes, and I just know she's staring down at her hands whilst she's fiddling with a hangnail from a nail she destroyed earlier on in a day. You know why I know this? Because that's exactly what she did when dad died.

When he got shot.

3 bullets to the chest.

When police men arrived at our door, in the middle of my mum preparing our dinner, and told us he was dead. Malevolently shot on the way home from work.

I was seven. She had to explain to me when I was SEVEN why my daddy wasn't coming home.

She'd lost half of her world. Half of anything she had to live for.

And now I was here.

Lying here helpless and she had to say goodbye to me as well. I can't even imagine what's happening in her head right now.

Well, I know this is shattering her world, but she'll tell no one how much it hurts. She won't tell a soul how her heart is breaking and how she can hardly feel the air in her lungs because every breath she tries to take is like gas. It hurts so much to breathe in and out. The simplest thing to do. Any human being can do it as soon as they are born, and she's finding it almost impossible.

But she'll tell no one. She'll keep it all locked up inside until her last breath, many, many years from now, and then she'll take it to wherever we go next. Because that's the kind of woman my mum is, and I wouldn't change any part of her for the world, because she is the most amazing woman I've ever met. So, so brave.

She breathes in, and slowly let's the air out again. "I love you so, so much. I know you already know this but, I love you."

She places her hand on my arm, she's shaking like crazy.

Mum you're going to be fine without me. I love you so much too. Please know that forever. Please?

"I know you so well, and um, I know this is impossibly hard for you too. Frustrating because you can hear our words but reply nothing yourself, but I know you're thanking me inside your head for the life you've had and... I love you." She sighs and then steps back.

What now?

I am trying so hard to stay awake.

I want to hear someone speak, but the room is so, so quiet. Until I hear someone step forward and crouch down by my bed.

The place a cold hand on my cheek and stroke it once gently.

A man's hand. It's a sweaty hand, and it's shaking like absolute crazy. Whoever it is, they're very, very nervous. But the touch feels right somehow. It feels like, ah, I can't describe it. Like this hand is meant to touch me, it's meant to reach out and touch my cheek. But I don't know why.

"Hey Anna." He says.

No, no. It can't be.

Maybe in my delusional state anyone would think I'm imagining this. But there is no mistaking that voice. That touch. That warm, comforting, amazing touch.

Adam Young is sat beside me.

Adam Young is breathing the same air as me.

No one would know it but I am screaming in my head, crying and laughing all at the same time. It was always so much more than a dream, it was almost like a promise to myself that I'd meet him someday. My whole life I've waited for this. And now I'm getting all I have ever needed, a moment of Adam's time concentrated on me, and only me.

"So I hear your something of a Hootowl!" He says, laughing slightly, "well, I'm not sure what exactly what to say here, because I guess I'm a pretty shy guy, but apparently me being here now would help you. So hello." He sounds so awkward. That's my Adam.

He strokes my cheek again and leans over me a little, I can hear him better now as he says;

"You're beautiful, so beautiful. You know that? You will be forever in my heart as the bravest girl I have ever met. Seriously. I'm actually doing a show tomorrow night, and you know something? It's dedicated to you. You'll have a shout out and by the end of the show everyone will know your story. I'm going to tell your story to everyone, so they will know just what an incredible, brave girl you are."

Then as I smile like a freak in my head, and feel all fuzzy warm inside, practically like I'm on fire, I feel a tear drop onto the top of my arm, right wear he's leaning over. Adam Young shed a tear for me! I can't even imagine the reactions when Becky tells everyone that.

I want to cradle him in my arms and tell him not to be upset, but it seems he has this covered for me.

He leans over me in a hug and tells me to not be afraid. He tells me to never be afraid because I'll always be in his and so many others minds.

And now, right at this second I realise something.

Something amazing.

I'm ready to go.

Queue my wonderful mother as she comes, crouches next to where Adam is and whispers "you can go now darling."

My mum kisses me on my hand and sobs quietly. Becky hugs onto my legs, crying so much into them, and Adam kisses me once more on the cheek, and doesn't break the kiss.

I stop fighting to stay awake.

I relax every part of my body.

I breathe once more.

And with my check burning from the most amazing kiss of my life I call to the heavens to say I'm ready.

I'm ready to go.