Crowns And Shadows (MXM) (Book 1)

XIX: It Was Madness

Garrick

I sat by the riverbank, the water glimmering under the fading sunlight, letting the gentle sounds wash over me. For days, I had been going there, flute in hand, playing melodies that reflected the confusion in my heart. Each note carried a piece of the longing I felt for him, Prince Rowan—a want that had blossomed the moment our lips had met.

Of course when I first saw him I had no clue that he was the prince. He was just leisurely taking a swim in the stream. At first, it was just curiousity and now this need burned. A flame I couldn't extinguish. This man whose family I had grown to despise and swore to revenge...

Despite knowing better, I couldn’t help but wait for him. That touch had stirred something deep within me, something I had tried to ignore, yet there I was, every day, returning to that sacred place. It was our sanctuary, a spot where the hatred we both shared was irrelevant, leaving only the raw truth of what we might've grown to share.

But he hadn’t come. Not for days. Each sunset I spent here felt like an echo of his absence, the melodies becoming more melancholic, like a haunting refrain. I sighed, brushing my fingers through my hair as I always did when I was aggravated. But at that moment the frustration mingled with a strong yearning.

Then, as if conjured by my desperate thoughts, he appeared, riding on a horse. I heard the twig smash and I knew it was him. I could hardly breathe. I looked at him from the corner of my eyes keeping as much tranquility as I could. But the sight of him standing there, framed by the trees, made my heart race.

And now there he was, standing before me, my heart pounding as I awaited his reply. Would he embrace the chaos together? Or perhaps I was mistaken and the only fire that had been ignited was mine.

He opened his mouth to speak and the first thing he said was, "I don’t even know your name." His words hung in the air.

“Garrick,” I replied, my voice steady despite the flutter of nerves within me.

"Garrick..." He echoed as if trying out the name on his tongue.

“You needn’t concern yourself with where I come from. That does not matter. What matters is where this will lead us.” I watched as his expression shifted from surprise to curiosity, intrigued by my boldness. “We can navigate this chaos together if you want us to.” The tension between us crackled with possibility, and I could see the glint of uncertainty in his eyes.

This was his decision to make as we stood there, our bodies almost touching. I wanted him to make the first step, mostly because I wasn't sure if I could do it myself. And just when I was going to step back, I felt him pull me by the collar and our lips collided.
The world around us faded into a blurry darkness. The kiss ignited the burn deep within me—overwhelming all my senses at once.

I let my hands wander to his waist as his fingers raked through my hair. The feeling was intense as we both fought for dominance of each other's mouths. I explored the curves of his back, learning them, mustering them..

But as I pulled away for air, reality crashed back in like a wave. Rowan’s eyes were still closed, as if he were savoring the moment trying to catch his breath. What had I just done? The thrill of the kiss gave way to a wave of embarrassment that flushed my cheeks.

“I can’t—” I stammered, my voice barely above a whisper. Panic gripped me. I couldn’t face him now, not with all the uncertainty swirling in my mind. Without another word, I turned and slipped into the shadows, the river’s gentle murmur fading behind me.

I didn’t look back as I fled. The kiss lingered on my lips even after I had arrived at my home, a bittersweet reminder of what I was dearly desperate for.

I was a coward. Each time I had initiated and each time I ran. How could I  have gone back again? Not after that. Perhaps he had been right. It was madness.