Diary Of An Unstable Teen

the urges are back

my urges are back

I still hold the memories inside my head

I think about it a lot

and it scares me

I used to be like that

I used to have cuts from my wrist up to my elbow

I still have scars but they are faded

and I'm trying 

but that image pops up in my head

the one the night I tried

I tried to end it

and I was a mess

I was a crying mess

I was shaking

sitting on the bathroom floor

no one at school knows what I've been through

I'm my own trauma

every time I look into the mirror I am reminded

of the girl I used to be

and I fought so hard to stay out of that place

and now I'm back

I'm back in it

and that hurts me a lot more