Love, me.

Empty

George

Cheers rang through the country roads as I climbed what seemed to be a never-ending stretch of uphill. As I glanced at my bike computer, I groaned inwardly when I realised there was thirty kilometres more to go; more climbing. Despite the burning sensation in my legs, I felt free for the first time in a week. It was the only time her face stopped haunting me as I allowed myself to soak in the atmosphere of race day once again, feeling adrenaline rush through me as I counted down the distance left before the next leg of the race. 

Just before I rolled into the transition area, I spotted Fergie who waving ecstatically, drawing a grin from me, a feeling that felt so foreign yet familiar. Memories of my last race crept into my mind as the person I yearned to see was absent this time around. Shaking my head, I cleared my mind for the half-marathon that laid ahead of me as I slipped out of my helmet after docking my bike.

Before I knew it, I was running into the finishing line where I heard my name being called out by the race announcer congratulating me on completing the race I had trained so hard for. I was shattered but it was the best I had felt in a long time. Heading off to retrieve my bicycle and other kit from the transition area, I spotted my friends who came running towards me with huge smiles on their faces.

"Finally! Let's celebrate with a beer that George has been refusing all year!" Fergie joked as kinked her arms with mine as she pulled me towards our group of friends who I had not met in a while. 

The night was uneventful as I sat surrounded by my friends at the restaurant, sharing stories and catching up on the last few months. Lighthearted banter were made and it helped me distract myself from depressing thoughts of Rae being in close proximity with Erik even though I had told her to work things out with him. Never did I expect myself to fall for this green-eyed girl, and yet I did.

The buzzing from my phone snapped me out of my thoughts.

"How did your race go? I hope you are well."

My heart leapt with joy seeing a message come through from her, although I quickly suppressed the emotion that I simply could not allow myself to feel. I was really tempted to respond and had millions of questions to ask her.

I slipped my phone back into my pocket, leaving the message unanswered as I forced myself to concentrate on my friends that surrounded me as I felt physically and mentally empty.