Not Waving, But Drowning || Lee Know Centric

t w o

I arrived about ten minutes after.

When I arrived, they didn't even care to give me a glance, or to see who even came in.

They were angry.

Even my only hyung wouldn't even look at me.

I really messed up.

I'll punish myself later, anyway.

"Okay guys, let's get straight to work!" Our dance teacher walked in, throwing his bag onto the floor and going to the middle of the room. Everyone followed, standing into their positions.

This can't go wrong, right? I mean, dance is my profession. I'm supposed to be the best dancer in stray kids. But how could that be when there's Hyunjin and Felix around?

"Okay focus!" He clapped his hands, looking at me through the mirror as I was just zoning out. "Let's start from the top." He rolled his eyes, and focused back to himself.

That was embarrassing. Changbin saw him looking straight at me. He was probably thinking the exact same thing.

Useless.
Fucking worthless piece of shit.

As I got lost in my own thoughts, I accidentally tripped on Jisung's foot, somehow making him trip too.

"Oh my god Jisung are you okay?"

"Did you hurt yourself?"

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Minho?"

I immediately looked at the person who said that, just to be met with the dance teachers hard glare.

Prepare yourself Minho, you're gonna get humiliated, AGAIN.

"Are you doing this on purpose? Trying to get all the fucking attention by hurting your teammates?"

"Sir he wasn-" Our leader spoke, but got cut off.

"Shut up! Minho, go outside and think about how you're ruining their careers. Don't even bother coming it out, fat piece of..."

Every word he said after that came as a blur, the sound through my ears muffling and my eyes starting to tingle.

Fat.

That's what you are.

A pig.

I didn't even grab my bags before walking out the door, slamming it shut and running to the bathroom. I locked myself in a stall and slid down to the floor, tears streaming down my face.

Lee know never cry?

Hah, you know nothing. Absolutely nothing.

After a few minutes, I wiped my tears with a paper towel and flushed the toilet, getting out the stall and seeing...

Who is that?

That can't be me, right?

Since when has my face been so big?

And my stomach, I haven't even eaten something this morning, why is bloated?

My thighs, legs, arms, chest, everything.

FAT FAT FAT FAT FAT

Not even just fat, but ugly too.

No wonder JYP kicked you out the group, he knew you'd be such a disappointment.

Disappointment.

That's what I am.

I've disappointed everyone,

Again.