I'm Not Your Plaything *AlphaEnigma*

Ecstasy

POV: Jes

The day Jes spent with Bible, riding through the raw, untamed nature, just the two of them together, left him with a warmth that spread through his entire body. It felt like soaking in the sunshine on a perfect summer day. The calming effect eased the tension and pressure of the past few days, allowing him to breathe a little easier.

Yet, despite the peace, the pain he had caused the Alpha still lingered deep in his heart, like a scar etched into his soul. The memory of Bible's tears made his heart ache, and he knew something had to change. They couldn't keep going like this.

Jes noticed how different Bible seemed when they spent time together—more relaxed, talkative, and happy. It was as if the Alpha transformed into a completely different person. And now, after their trip, Jes could see something else in the way Bible looked at him—an emerging connection, a glimmer of emotions catching up with them both.

The bond between them was intense, undeniably so, but they still had weeks to spend together. And that terrified Jes. He was scared of hurting Bible again, maybe worse than before. He couldn't let that happen.

➶

In the late afternoon, Jes went back to his office. He wanted an update on how the meeting went, which he couldn't attend.

Job came in his office with a worried look, noticing Jes's downcast expression. "What's going on with you? Is everything okay?"

"Actually, no. I feel like a piece of shit," Jes admitted, his voice filled with guilt.

"Why? What happened? Didn't you clear things up with Bible?" Job asked, his concern deepening.

"I was so mad at him," Jes began, his voice raspy with regret. "I thought he was with someone else, and it made me do things I deeply regret now."

"What did you do, Jes?" Job asked, his voice laced with worry.

"I... I lost control. I let my pheromones slip, and I couldn't stop myself. He even cried. He was so scared... and then..." Jes's voice broke, unable to continue.

"And then what?" Job pressed gently.

"Then he forgave me, just like that. I can't believe it. I feel horrible. What if I hadn't snapped out of it? What if I had done something even worse?" Jes asked, his voice filled with despair.

"But you didn't, Jes. You stopped," Job said, trying to reassure him. "Why are you always so hard on yourself—and on Bible? You need to relax more, let things flow, and see where it takes you two."

Jes shook his head, resolute. "He doesn't deserve an abusive Enigma like me as a partner. We have to work even harder to find the medication," he said, his voice firm with determination.

"But Jes..." Job was taken aback by Jes's decision.

"I know you think we can make it work together, but it's better for him not to be with someone like me," Jes insisted.

"And how will you manage in the coming days?" Job asked, sensing Jes had something planned.

"I'll spend more time with him," Jes replied. "I know it sounds strange, but when he's with me, it feels like the bond calms him down. He acts differently, more at peace. I won't push him away. Until we have the medication, I need to manage it, for both of us, so that nothing happens to make me lose control again."

"You're planning to use his feelings?" Job asked, a little taken aback.

"Not his real feelings, just the ones that come from the bond," Jes explained, trying to justify his actions.