(REWRITING IN PROCESS)
Reiner grips my hands a little tighter. "I...I like you. A lot," he stammers. "You're on my mind all the time." He looks down at his lap, shaking his head before looking up at me again. "I know it sounds crazy, but... I think...
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Present: Age 22
There's a knock at the door but I don't bother answering. I stay curled in a ball as the door slowly creaks open and then softly shuts.
There's footsteps across the room before the sound stops. I look up to see Hange as she sits on the edge of Sasha's bed. My eyes stay fixed on the floor as she speaks to me.
"I'm sorry." She says softly. "I should have warned you that he was coming."
I'm not crying anymore but I'm slow to respond. My eyelids feel heavy with the puffiness from crying so much. "You knew he was coming and you didn't say anything." My voice cracks even through the whisper. My throat is dry and raw from all of the tears.
"I don't know. I thought... you might go rogue, do something impulsive. You are very vital to our team and we couldn't lose you. But I should have told you. I'm sorry Blair."
My eyes flicker to Hange's now. I must look like absolute shit because her composure breaks as her face breaks into worry.
"Why would you guys let him come back? After all this time, after everything he's done."
"It wasn't an easy decision, we didn't agree with this overnight. But Reiner's a valuable asset, he's a Marleyan warrior and he knows the ins and out of their military. We need his knowledge to help us win this war. I know it's hard, seeing him again, but we need him. And we need you." She pauses, her voice softening. "You don't have to forgive him, or be nice, you can even punch him when I'm not looking. But you have to remember at the end of the day we are on the same team."
I'm silent for a moment as I take in her words. I'm not mad at Hange, I understand why she did what she did. Her duty as Commander is to lead us as a whole to victory. And that means my feelings may come last. But there's just one thing I can't forgive.
"Did that have to include Zeke?"
Hange grimaces before letting out a short laugh. "That...is another story."
~~~
I do everything in my power to avoid Reiner the next two weeks. Surprisingly, the chaos around me has worked to my advantage.
Hange has kept me plenty busy. She's constantly sending me off to do tasks that are well below my rank and pulling me into meetings that don't really involve me. She hasn't admitted it, but I know she's doing it for my sake. She feels bad and she's trying her best to keep me occupied so I don't have a run in with Reiner. Even though I know it's only a matter of time before I eventually have to deal with him.
While mindlessly walking into the common room, I scan for Armin and Connie. I spot the back of their heads as they sit at a table. But I halt when I notice Reiner is sitting alongside them.
Reiner must sense my presence because he looks up making direct eye contact with me. He quickly glances down, mumbling as he begins to stand. "I'll leave you guys to it."
As if on cue Armin and Connie swivel around in their chairs, noticing me leaning in the door frame with my arms crossed.
"Yeah, you do that." I mutter, not even bothering to glance at him as he walks towards the door. I side step out of his way, not wanting any part of him to touch me even if it's just the light brush of his shirt against mine. I can feel him watching me as he passes but I refuse to acknowledge it.
"We were just—" Armin starts, but I cut him off as I drop my hands to my side, continuing to walk over toward them.
I try to roll my eyes playfully but I'm not sure it comes off that way. "Plotting with the enemy?"
There's an awkward silence as Connie and Armin quickly glance at each other.
I let out an annoyed sigh as I pull out a chair before sitting across from them. "It was a joke. Geez, rough crowd." I shrug my shoulders. "It's fine, I don't care." I do care, but I made a promise to Hange.
"Are you sure you're okay?" Armin asks cautiously, in a soft voice.
"We have bigger things to worry about. Let's move on."
Connie fidgets with his hands. "If you ever want to talk about it..."
"There's nothing to talk about." My words come out a little too sharply. I sigh, trying again with a softer tone. "There's nothing to talk about. Let's focus on the things that really matter, like tonight's meeting."
Connie looks at me almost suspiciously for a second. "Okaayy." He slightly drags out. "This is our first meeting with everyone together including the Marlyeans." He pauses glancing at me for a reaction. I raise an eyebrow at him but don't react otherwise.
Armin speaks up. "We should really use this meeting to gather information about the inside of their military. How it works, their weapons, and so on. Perhaps we can figure out a weakness within their ranks and plan from there."
"Yeah, a plan to kick their asses." Connie gives us a goofy grin at his comment.
Armin and I glance at each other before rolling our eyes at Connie.
I shake my head with a soft smile. "Some people never grow up I see."
Connie slaps his hands on the table. "What!? I'm way taller now, what are you talking about?"
I groan, placing a hand on my forehead.
Armin places a hand on Connie's shoulder to calm him down. "I don't think that's what she meant."
Connie looks at Armin like he's got four heads. "What else would she mean?"
I shake my head, signaling Armin to let it go. Connie sometimes takes things too literally and we'll be here all day trying to explain.
———
A/N: As much as I hate Zeke I stumbled upon a one shot of him on A03 and it's sooooo good. It's Stormy Nights by The_Girl_Marauder
