Falling for the Fire

Chapter 34

*Brooklyn's POV

I looked back at Ariana as she waited for an answer from me, and I felt about as sure as she did.

I knew deep down what I wanted this to be, but what I wanted it to be and what it could be were two very different things.

"Well," I sighed, "I know I definitely don't want it to be a one time thing."

I smirked at her as I put my hand on the side of her face and leaned in to press a gentle kiss to her lips. I couldn't get enough of them.

"Okay," she said as I pulled away, "that's a good start because I didn't want that either."

"Look at that," I grinned, "we're on the same page already."

My fingers slowly raked through her soft hair as I continued to contemplate. How were we going to make this work?

If I could get over my stubbornness it would be a lot easier, but I wasn't willing to do that after what had happened last time.

"Can I ask you something..." Ari trailed off, "something kind of personal?"

"That sounds scary," I said, "but sure, go for it."

"Have you been in a relationship before? Or have you never been a fan of them?" She asked.

My stomach dropped at the question, even though I should've known it was coming.

"I um," I started.

"You don't have to tell me if you'd prefer not to," she quickly cut in, "I'm sorry."

"No, no," I shook my head, "it's a fair question, and yes I have been in a couple before."

I left it at that, hoping that she wouldn't question me further.

"Oh..." she responded quietly.

"It's not just you either," I clarified, "I promise."

"I know," she said, "but why do you avoid them now?"

I hadn't been expecting that part, I didn't think she'd go that far.

"I'll tell you that when you tell me why you hate your mom so much," I said.

As soon as the words left my mouth, I immediately regretted it. Ari's face fell and she went completely silent.

"I'm sorry," I quickly added, "that was shitty of me to ask, I shouldn't have said that."

"And this," I continued, "is why I was hesitant to let this happen again, I don't want to hurt you or anything...or say more stupid shit."

"No I - you're not," she told me, "I know what I'm getting myself into. And I shouldn't have asked you what I did either, so I get it, it's okay."

"You don't sound very convincing," I softly said.

"Brooklyn, I wouldn't be doing this if I wasn't okay with it," she said sternly, "trust me."

"I'm still not sure that I know you well enough to trust you," I told her playfully.

"Well," she paused, "I guess that's a risk you'll have to be willing to take."

"And you still haven't really answered me by the way," she continued.

"I know," I nodded, "I'm still thinking."

Ariana raised an eyebrow as she gave me a questioning look.

"If it's taking you that long to think about - "

"Hey, no," I cut her off, "I didn't mean thinking about if I wanted this to be a thing or not, you know that I do. I'm just trying to figure out the best way to go about it so it doesn't mess anything up for either of us."

She nodded silently as she laid there next to me, and I still felt like there was a sense of disappointment in her eyes, but I tried to ignore it. I didn't want to say anything to upset her again.

"Casual...friends with benefits?" She asked hesitantly.

"That's only going to work if you're willing to call me your friend," I grinned.

"I think I can manage that," she said in response.

"Good," I said, "then I can live with that."

"Good," she echoed, "we have a deal."

I smiled over at her as my hand continued to run through her hair. A deal, yeah, something like that.

"Okay," I said, "am I allowed to leave now without you accusing me of running off?"

"Hmm," she started thoughtfully, "yeah, I'll allow it."

"Thank you," I said as I leaned in and gave her another quick kiss, a smile curling over my lips.

I reluctantly crawled out of the comfortable bed and away from the gorgeous woman I was laying next to. There was a large part of me that did want to stay curled up next to her all night, but I couldn't do that to either of us. It would only make things more complicated.

I looked back at her as I pulled my clothes on and saw her watching me.

"See you tomorrow?" I said.

"See you tomorrow," she nodded.

She gave me a lazy smirk and I waved to her as I walked out of the room.

I got out to my car and sat down in the front seat, staring blankly forward. I couldn't shake the feeling that this wasn't a good idea, but I wanted it so badly, wanted her so badly.

I was almost mad at myself for agreeing to anything with Ariana, but I knew that I shouldn't be.

We were both adults, we could do this...right?

***

When I walked into the office building the next morning, I couldn't help but feel nerves building up in my stomach. I really wasn't sure how to act around Ariana, or how she was going to act around me.

As much as I could say that we were just going to be normal, I was fully aware that this whole arrangement might take some getting used to. Especially when we were at work together.

As soon as I saw Ari sitting at the conference table, I knew this was going to be difficult. Her hair was swept back in a low bun, and her button down shirt was positioned just right so I could see a tiny bit of her cleavage that was peeking out.

I blinked my eyes rapidly a few times, like that was going to make her look less tempting or something, and I went to sit down.

"Morning," I said as I took the chair next to her.

"Hey Brooklyn," she responded.

When she looked up at me and flashed her perfect looking smile, I knew that I was in trouble.

——————————————