ACCEPTING 'US'

13.

Sudha's POV:

After meeting Rukmini I was again back to my old self. I would just go to the farm or the local market sometimes with dadi. Rukmini would meet me sometimes in the market but as dadi was with me we were not able to communicate properly.
I was walking to a store with dadi when I saw rukmini gesturing me to come towards her.
" Dadi rukmini is there. I will go and have a word with her " I gestured towards her direction and dadi nodded. I slowly went towards her and she pulled me towards a corner so no one could hear us.
" Why are we here? Why did you pull us in a corner? " I questioned looking around.
" Why are you getting worked up for nothing? I brought a book which will help you with your relationship with your husband. Come to the same spot this evening " rukmini said seriously.
" Umm... Okay I will convince dadi and will come by five. Is that fine? " I asked.
" Yeah. That would be fine. Come let's go. Meet you in the evening " she said and carried on with her work while I went to dadi casually.
It was afternoon, we had lunch and dadi was trying to take a nap.
" Dadi I have a question? " I asked casually and she looked at me.
" Why do people get married? And is that necessary to get married? " I asked curiously.
" You are asking this after marriage? " She said and chuckled.
" Please dadi tell me " I showed my puppy eyes.
" Marriage is a part of life which fulfills one's needs. It's not like life will be incomplete without marriage but marriage will provide a human with a companion, a friend, a supporter, a healer, a lover and a provider until death " she said.
" Dadi you are alone. Dadaji passed away a long time ago. Then don't you feel the need to have him? " I asked again.
" Sudha your dadaji is gone for you all. But for me he is still alive in my memories. The moments we spent, the life we spent together and the children we had are still alive. And I believe his essence is still here although he is not with us humanly " she said with tears brimming her eyes.
" And one more thing I think I should tell you. Married life not only involves emotional and financial dependence but also physical needs. It's the most important part of married life. Everything can be achieved in different ways maybe emotional or financial support from other family members but physical needs is something which can be satisfied with the person we love. Love is the most essential part of life. The love you have for your partner is what makes you feel special. I don't think I need to extend this topic as you might be aware of this already. Just remember it is the most beautiful thing in married life " she said.
" Dadi enough of talking. You should sleep now " I said after a while. Dadi just nodded and slept giving me space.
" Dadi I am going to the temple. Will be back soon " I said and was about to leave.
" What's there in the temple that you are going now? " She asked furrowing her brows.
" Nothing dadi. Today rukmini is going to conduct a pooja there so she asked me to come. Remember I met her in the market? That is what she told me " I lied casually.
" Okay but don't be too late " she said. I soon went towards the tree behind the temple where rukmini was already waiting for me.
" Come sit I will tell you what to do " she gestured me to sit. She opened the book in her hand and after turning several pages she opened the page she was looking for and handed me the book.
" What? " I asked looking at the page.
" What what? Come on start reading " she encouraged.
I looked at her and then the book and turned it upside down. It's tenth class science textbook. I sighed heavily not understanding her intentions.
" Rukmini, are you kidding? This is our tenth standard science textbook. Why should I read it now? " I said giving her a displeased look.
" Oh madam I know what I gave to you. And look what I want you to read " she gestured towards the book. I read the chapter name " Reproductive system ".
" You want me to read this? " I asked again disapprovingly. During our school we were not allowed to read this chapter and only two or three selective questions were chosen as it can be left in choice. So everyone in class followed the instructions as it would be a less burden to skip a chapter. And now rukmini is encouraging me to read the same chapter.
" Yes. You will read this and I am going to help you with your doubts " she said with excitement.
" Why did you read this chapter? We were not allowed to read this during school right? " I asked.
" Yes and I don't need to read this chapter to understand it because I know everything already " she said proudly.
" Whatever " I said and started reading it slowly.
Like that she started explaining me all the parts of reproductive system of female. At first it felt awkward but seeing rukmini so normal I too got comfortable. I was shocked to know so many things about my own body.
Then came the male reproductive system. It was the most awkward situation for me while rukmini was poking her finger in each part and showing me the parts. I understood it even though it was weird.
" Okay now finally the main portion of the chapter " she giggled and I looked at her with raised brows.
I continued reading the next part of the chapter which was about 'coitus '. I shut the book as soon as I got to know what it meant. I shut my eyes tightly and covered my face not knowing what to do.
" Hey sudha, what happened? " She questioned removing my hands from my face.
" So this is what happens? " I asked her. She nodded her head while I looked away with embarrassment.
" Sudha you don't have to feel so ashamed. This is exactly what happens and much more before that " she said and my eyes widened in shock.
" More? " I gasped.
" Yes sudha. This is the basic they have given here but this content does not even consists of ten percent of what actually happens " she said. I reminded silent and kept thinking looking here and there.
" What's remaining ninety percent? " I asked after a long time.
" What? " She asked.
" You heard me and I want to know everything " I said not looking at her.
" It might include touching, kissing, smooching, nibbling and sometimes changing positions and all " she said plucking the grass carelessly.
" Po... positions? What positions? " I asked.
" That the no.... " She was saying when someone called for her.
" Sudha I think someone is here for me. And I am sorry but tomorrow I am going back so I think this will be our last meeting this time " she said sadly.
" Okay no problem. Take care " I said and hugged her.
" And the next time we meet you should tell me about positions " she giggled while I didn't understand her words.
We both exited the temple and I went back home.
After Rukmini left, there was no one for me to entertain. Dadi was with me but it was different with rukmini.
I was again busy with reading my books and passing time.
" Sudha come let's go out. I have some work and you are going to accompany me " dadi said and I kept my book aside and went with her.
She took me to a cloth store and bought me two pair of clothes. Then she took me to bangle store and bought various designs of them.
I insisted her not to buy them but she was adamant and didn't hear me. I kept ranting about it the whole way back home and also after entering home.
" Dadi I already told you there was no need for you to buy them. But still you being you, do not listen to me " I said. Someone cleared the throat and that's when I looked up and my world stopped.
There he sat with papa and a glass in his hand. He kept looking at me and I didn't understand what to say or do.
Dadi went and talked to him while his gaze was lingering on me every now and then.
" I will look after the dinner preparations  " I tried to excuse myself.
" Everything is ready sudha. You take him to your room and show around too. It's the first time he came after marriage " papa said not giving me a chance to speak further.
I showed him around and he kept looking at me whole time. It felt strange as well as exciting but I didn't forget what he said back home.
" This is my room. Technically dadi's too. Now that I am not around she will be here " I said turning towards him.
" It's nice " he said and didn't even look around the room. I sighed not understanding his problem. I gestured him to sit while I opened the almirah to put my books back.
" Sudha that...that I am sorry for you know everything " he said.
" Okay " I said after a while. I was damn angry with him and he don't have words to express his apology properly. So the only option I have is to accept his apology and stop minding his business. Guess what? I think he was not going to let me.
" Sudha " he called. I turned around and raised my brows asking his problem. He didn't say anything so I was about to turn to continue my work but he held my hand. Goosebumps rose on my arms and my body felt a strange feeling due to his breath near my ear.
" Sudha I am sorry " he said and turned me towards himself and hugged me suddenly. I didn't know this was coming and I didn't know how to react.
He moved his hands from my back to waist making a shiver run down my spine. His lips were placed on my neck and he was giving small kisses there making me vulnerable. I don't know what I was waiting for or for what I was vulnerable for but I don't want this to stop. He kept caressing my whole back with urgency and his lips now moved from my neck to jaw. I held his shoulders as I think I will fall down and he held me tightly.
" I am sorry...." He kept repeating while torturing my jaw and throat with kisses while I was completely carried away with bliss that I did not realise that I am angry with him and I am standing in my room where my dadi could walk in anytime.
I pushed him away after sometime breathing heavily. His condition was worse that me and he bit his lips tightly.
" I think we should go and have dinner. They might be waiting " I said breathlessly. He didn't utter a word and just nodded his head.
While having dinner I was not able to concentrate on dinner as I kept thinking how he was kissing me. Then I recalled what rukmini said and understood what it meant. There was more about than just ' coitus ' I thought. I shook my dirty thoughts away and had dinner as soon as possible.
Dadi went to sleep in the hall while I was left with my husband to share the room. I slept on my side while he slowly placed his hand on my shoulder. He moved his hand from there till my arm giving me goosebumps. I was feeling extremely hot now. I turned towards him who looked at me. He kissed my eyes, nose, cheeks and stopped near my lips. I don't know how it would feel to touch his lips with mine. He moved his head back and hugged me. After a while he slept peacefully and I too closed my eyes.
He woke me up early in the morning to pack the things. I soon packed everything and took a quick bath. He just washed his face and arms after brushing his teeth.
" Have some fruits on your way back home " dadi said and handed us fruits. I hugged her and after sometime we left to home.
Surprisingly this time he talked while on cart. He talked about how he liked our place and the food.
" I really love your bed. It's really soft and smooth " he said.
" I know " I said.
" And you are more soft and smooth than bed. That's the favorite part of your bed " he winked at me while I blushed harder.

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