Breaking Boundaries *(RINNEY)*

Hurt Chapter 25

(Finney's POV)

I stared at Robin my eyes peeled open at the sight of him on my floor holding the box. That very box. "Robin-" "I mean yeah...But you didn't get rid of this?" "It's-" "I thought you were gonna quit?" "Robin look-" "I mean, yeah it's only been like two days...But really?" "Can I just-" "Are you gonna actually quit." Robin looked down as he was now standing. "I-..." "Answer me Finn, are you gonna quit?" 

I scratched the back of my neck feeling a tendency I haven't felt for years. "So you lied?" "No, I mean, I will someday...I'm just not really ready I guess?" Robin looked up at me before putting the box on my bed. "Well that's a great Christmas gift Finn." Robin mumbled before slamming the door shut on his way out. I inhaled sharply before lying down on my bed. I pulled the covers over me not caring that I was wearing shoes. My mind was blank...Why did Robin sound so much like him....Like dad...

I just stared...I felt like crying but I just couldn't, the tears just wouldn't come out. And My mind was all frizzled and my heart was beating out my chest. I just couldn't catch my breath. It felt like my lungs were filled with water...I lay flat on my bed sweating with my covers on the ground. What the fuck is wrong with me. What the fuck is wrong with me. WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME.

I almost choked before I sat up my fist clenched. I stood up before grabbing my coat that was hung on a hook. I picked up the stupid box before leaving my room and going to the bathroom before leaving through that window. Once I got outside I threw the box against the ground, all the stuff scattering among the snow. The box cracked before I picked it up again and threw it. Anger rushed through me before I grabbed the box again and threw it against the tree feeling nothing but rage went through my veins. 

I couldn't stop it either, I couldn't stop the rush of anger through me, or the fact that my mind was corrupted with the shittiest thoughts ever. "FUCK" I screamed feeling hot tears fall from my eyes. I started hyperventilating before collapsing on the ground. I felt like I just got stabbed over 50 times in the chest. My chest kept heaving up and down as I stared up at the dark blue sky, the sun was gonna set soon. The snow was cold against my legs as I decided to put on shorts. I was sure that I was gonna have frost bite.

But who cares. I sat up and my breathing was still heavy. I looked at my hands that were a bright red...Better go inside. I stood up my knees feeling weak. When I climbed up the ladder I just felt like I couldn't move anymore, that my body was gonna stay in this weak conception. I backed up against the brick wall pulling my knees to my chest. Man this felt familiar...Suddenly the window cracked open. When I looked up I saw Vance with his hair tied up. "Oh...Hey..." Vance looked guilty as he made eye contact with me, I didn't know why...

He climbed out the window before sitting across from me in the small cramped area. He put a cigarette to his lips before looking down and sighing. "What are you doing out here?" He questioned. "I'd like to ask you the same thing." I mumbled my head against the corner. He looked at me before taking another drag of the cigarette. 

"Finney." "Yeah?" "Did you remember me from Middle School?" "Barely..." I picked at my skin on my thumb before I made eye contact with Vance again. "Why?" I asked. "Well I was just wondering....And since basically this whole school is just filled with rich idiots and people like you and me..." I nodded. "I'm not gonna lie to you, I actually hated you when I first met you, I felt like you were just a complete attention grabbing asshole....But you're not...You're actually cool..." Vance sighed before flicking the ashes off his cigarette.

"So you hated me?" "I mean yeah." "And now you like me?" I laughed. "Mmmm" Vance hummed. I scoffed and rolled my eyes. Vance threw his cigarette in the snow before standing up. "Come inside soon, you'll get frostbite." I nodded before Vance left out the window.

For some reason I smiled at myself before leaving a little bit after him. 

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I entered my room feeling stiff as I walked in. I needed to go to the bathroom so I simply went to ours. I opened the door to only see Robin listening to music on headphones doing his hair care. He stared at me before taking off his headphones and looking down at me. I bit my lip feeling nerves rush through me as he gave me a doubtful stare. "Look Robin I'm really sorry, It was a misunderstanding, I haven't touched the box in the last few days and I was gonna get rid of it I promise-" Before I could go on Robin hugged me. 

I was confused, but I leaned into the hug feeling his warmth wrap around me. "God Finn...I'm sorry, I just don't want you to do that shit anymore...I overreacted...But I still like you, I just couldn't help it...." Robin sniffed before breaking the hug and wiping his eyes. "I should be the one who's sorry...Which I am..." I said weakly smiling at Robin who just stared at me not knowing what emotion to show....

"But Finn....I don't want you to feel like you have to take drugs because of me..." "Why would I?" "It's just....I feel like, if I ever make you feel like shit then, I wouldn't want you to hurt yourself...." I stared at Robin feeling a knife practically cut through my heart. "I don't wanna not be there...I just feel like maybe space is a better option...So you don't have to...You know-" "So your basically saying that you don't want to take the blame if I cut myself or do drugs?" "I mean...Not exactly?" "Then what?"

"It's my fault either way if I do that shit...You just think that it's happening cause of you?" "No." "Good, cause it's not...I mean maybe sometimes...But not like ever....." I looked at Robin feeling him look at me sorrowfully, but the only thing I felt was sort of...disgust?

I closed my mouth before backing up..."I'll talk to you later..." Robin nodded looking slightly relieved....

I HOPE YA ENJOYED IT