Desire

XX.

Isabel

As I woke up, a wave of nerves washed over me. I stared at the ceiling for a moment, letting the weight of the day settle in. Today was the day I'd look for my dad. I could already feel the tightness in my chest, an uncomfortable reminder of the unknown.

With a sigh, I pushed myself out of bed and made my way to the bathroom. The cold air hit me as I splashed water on my face, a small wake-up call that I desperately needed. I couldn't let my worries overshadow everything else, especially not when Lea was handling rehearsal all by herself. I just had to find him quickly and come back to her.

I rummaged through my closet, pulling out a pair of black thigh-high boots. They always made me feel a bit more confident, like I could take on the world, even if that world was filled with uncertainty today. I paired them with an oversized black knit sweater that enveloped me like a warm hug, and a long coat to shield me from the biting cold outside. I needed to feel comfortable yet strong; I hoped this outfit would give me the boost I needed.

As I stepped in front of the mirror, I took a moment to breathe deeply, trying to steady my racing heart. "You've got this," I whispered to myself. "Just go find him, and then you can return to her." The thought of Lea made me smile despite my nerves. I pictured her laughter, the way her eyes sparkled when she was excited, and I felt a flicker of hope.

After a quick breakfast, I grabbed my keys and phone. With one last glance at my reflection, I stepped out of the door, feeling the chill wrap around me as I headed to my car. Today was going to be tough, but I was determined to make it back to her—back to the warmth that made everything feel a little less daunting.

The drive felt longer than it was, each minute stretching out as I mentally prepared for what lay ahead. Finally, I pulled into the parking lot of my dad's apartment complex, my heart pounding in my chest. As I looked up, a wave of unease washed over me.

The building was a far cry from my modern apartment. It stood there like a relic of a bygone era, an aging structure that seemed to sag under the weight of its own history. The paint was peeling, revealing patches of weathered wood that had seen better days. The brick was discolored and cracked, with vines creeping up the sides as if nature was trying to reclaim it. The windows were grimy, some with shattered panes that had been hastily covered with cardboard or plastic.

A flickering neon sign hung above the entrance, its light struggling to illuminate the uneven pavement below. I could hear the faint sounds of the city outside, but they felt muted, as if this place existed in its own little bubble, detached from the world around it.

As I stepped out of my car, a chill ran down my spine—not just from the cold, but from the unsettling atmosphere of the complex. I wrapped my coat tighter around myself, taking a moment to steady my breath. This was the place my dad called home, and the thought of walking into that building filled me with apprehension.

I walked toward the entrance, the crunch of gravel under my boots echoing in the stillness. Each step felt heavier, a reminder of all the years of neglect and the distance that had grown between us. I hesitated at the door, my hand hovering above the handle, grappling with the mix of hope and fear swirling inside me. Would he be here? Would I even recognize him?

Taking a deep breath, I pushed the door open and stepped inside, the musty smell hitting me like a wave. The lobby was dimly lit, the walls lined with faded photographs that seemed to tell stories of happier times. But those times felt long gone, overshadowed by the weight of what had become of my dad. I glanced around, searching for any sign of life, hoping against hope that he would be waiting for me somewhere within these crumbling walls.

I approached the front desk, my nerves bubbling just beneath the surface. The receptionist looked up from her computer, her expression blank as I cleared my throat. "Hi, um, I'm looking for Arman Castillo. I'm his daughter."