Sacrifices

Chapter 15: Catch Me As I Fall

A/N: Just FYI - I will be following a different time line for a couple chapters. I'll be back to the main timeline soon. Hopefully no one is super confused :)

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"I never said thank you for that;

I thought I might get one more chance.
What would you think of me now?"

-Hear You Me, Jimmy Eat World-

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Sometime in the night, Danse awoke to the noose of sheets entangling his body as he jerked to free himself of the demons fingering his mind. The coiled tendrils of fabric constricted as he struggled to stave off the lingering nightmares and regain his grasp on reality. Except, the blackness yielded nothing, only serving to muddy his senses and disorient him further. The distant hum of beasts lurking in the shadows enmeshed with his desperate pants, sending his heart knocking against his ribs. He couldn't discern if the rasping of breath was his own or simply a manifestation of his delusions. Or worse, he wasn't alone. That thought alone had him clawing at the bed sheets and throwing out his arm, reaching for the rifle that wasn't there.

With the loss of spatial and temporal awareness, he was sucked into the vacuum of darkness, unable to escape the gnashing of teeth, tearing at his flesh as the putrid rot of death rolled his gut. He thrashed and fumbled to take hold of something, anything, to keep him afloat. Amidst his torment there was only an echo, an imprint that took seed in his mind. The feeling of fleeting touches and smooth skin, whispered words of endearment, and unspoken desires - the distant reassurance of another beside him were all that remained. Memories stringing him along through his abhorrent state, his mind would only allow him to conjure one word. A single name uttered as a plea.

"Jackie..." a lifeline to pull him from the sea of death. He groped through the darkness, and he wasn't sure if the weight nestled next to him was real or just a dream.

"Shh," like the break of dawn, she was there. Her hand came to greet his own and guided his fingers to rest upon her shoulder. She illuminated his world with brilliant warmth as she pushed back the damp threads of hair from his forehead. "I'm here." Soft tones spoken to ease the flaring scars within his battered mind, obtained by the brutality of battle. Marks of war, remnants of unbearable choices, all left behind in the most intimate of places. "You're alright," she cooed.

Fingers combed through his hair and traced down along his neck, pausing for a moment to allow the intimacy of her touch to be felt, as she softly scratched between the short strands at his nape. As much as he attempted to settle, the simple task of breathing felt more like a marathon of gulped air meeting protesting lungs. Tension ladened his body with the painful spasms of his muscles rendering him helpless to the irrationalities of his nightmares.

But Danse listened. He focused on Jackie's whispers of reassurance as he choked at the suffocating feeling in his throat and attempted to calm his pounding heart. The need to call out to her, just to hear her voice, to confirm that she was really there, overwhelmed him.

"Jackie." and he was ashamed of the way he whined her name, like a child unable to control his fearful cries because he was afraid of the monsters that lurked under the bed. This certainly wasn't the first time Jackie had soothed the burn of his nightmares, but he felt foolish for letting his insecurities get the better of him.

"I'm here. Danse, I'm here." No judgement lingered in her tone, only compassion and understanding because she had been here before, she knew how this felt. "Just breathe. Let it pass."