Baab 30..
Is waqiya ke aglay ek hafta tak un dono ke darmiyan koi guftagu nahin hui. Umer ne is baar maazrat karne ki koshish nahin ki thi aur is baat ne Alizeh ki ranjidgi aur gusse mein kuch aur izafa kiya tha. Is se pehle usne hamesha Umer ko chhoti si chhoti baat par bhi foran maazrat karte dekha tha aur woh is baat ki itni aadi ho chuki thi ke is baar pehle ki tarah us se maazrat na karne par woh jaise shocked ho gayi thi. Usne Nano ko Umer ke is tarah haath uthane ke baare mein nahin bataya tha, us ke liye ye itni tauheen aamiz baat thi ke woh kisi se is ke baare mein zikar kar hi nahin sakti thi.
Nano ne dono ke darmiyan mojood kashidgi ko mehsoos kar liya tha kyunki dining table par pehle ki tarah dono ke darmiyan hone wali guftagu ka silsila band ho chuka tha. Dono apne apne waqt par aate, khamoshi se khana khate aur uth kar chale jaate. Nano un ke darmiyan is be-aitnayi ko us din ke Umer ke tabsaray ka natija samajh kar sulah safai karwane ki koshish mein lagi rahi thin. Unhone dono ko alhadgi mein aur dining table par khana khane ke dauran bhi samjhane ki koshish ki magar woh buri tarah nakaam rahi thin. Alizeh agar narazgi door karne ki baat par mushtail ho jaati thi to Umer sire se is mauzo par baat karne ko hi tayar nahi tha. Woh har baar baat shuru karne par badi sakhti se Nano ko rok deta.
"Agar aap is mauzoo par baat karne ki koshish karengi to main yahan se uth kar chala jaunga."
Woh talkhi se kehta aur Nano khamosh ho jati. Umer in dinon bahar se aane wale apne samaan ko annexi mein rakhwane mein masroof tha. Nano ke bohat baar kehne ke bawajood bhi Alizeh ne uski madad karne ki koshish nahi ki. Do teen din woh waqfa-waqfa se cargo se aane wale apne samaan ko annexi ke kamron mein rakhwata raha. Alizeh din mein kai baar usse annexi ki taraf aate jaate dekhte rahi. Woh in dinon yakdam jaise bohat mutma’in nazar aa raha tha aur Alizeh ke liye yeh khabar takleef deh thi. Uska khayal tha ke woh agar usse maazrat nahi bhi karta tab bhi apni harkat par pashemaan zaroor hoga, magar Umer Jahangir ke rawaiye mein aisi koi baat nahi thi jisse Alizeh ko yeh lagta ke woh apni is harkat ki wajah se pareshaan hai. Zindagi mein pehli baar woh Umer Jahangir ke rawaiye se haqeeqi tor par hurt hui thi.
Zindagi mein pehli baar usne Umer aur apne ta’alluq ko ek nai nazar se dekhna shuru kiya tha. Pichhle paanch saal se uski zindagi mein Umer ke ilawa aur kuch bhi nahi tha. Usse mustaqil rabta na hone ke bawajood Alizeh ke liye duniya mein Umer se zyada aham koi nahi tha. Usne pichhle paanch saalon ko is tarah hi guzarne ki koshish ki thi jis tarah Umer ki khwahish thi. Umer jis cheez ko napasand karta, woh la-shu’oori tor par us cheez se katrane lagti. Umer jis cheez ko pasand karta, woh bhi us cheez ke ishq mein giraftar ho jati. Woh jaise Umrr ke pairawoon mein se thi, aankhen band kar ke sab kuch kar guzarne walon mein se jo usse kaha jata aur usse us cheez par rati bhar bhi malal mehsoos na hota. Uske liye itna hi kaafi tha ke Umer usse khush tha. Pehli baar usne Umer ki kisi baat se ikhtilaf kiya tha aur pehli baar hi Umer ka rawaiya...?
"Kya yeh shakhs kisi doosre mein sense of judgement develop kar sakta hai?" Uncle Jahangir tankid karte karte ya khud waisa nahi ho gaya kya.
Woh ab inteha par ja kar soch rahi thi.
"Mere liye hamesha sabse aham rehne wale shakhs ki zindagi aur nazar mein khud meri kya ahmiyat aur haisiyat hai? Uski nazar mein Alizeh Sikandar ki kya aukat hai? Ek immature larki jiski har khoobi aur har khaami se woh achi tarah waqif hai? Ya phir uski ungli pakar kar chalne wali larki jiski apni koi shakhsiyat sere se hai hi nahi? Aur main, main Alizeh Sikandar aakhir kab tak Umer ki chhatri ke saaye mein phalne phoolne ki koshish karti rahungi? Aur us shakhs ka saaya kitna bhi aaramdeh kyun na ho, magar woh mere wajood ko kabhi bhi apne qad tak aane nahi dega."
Uske zehan mein in dinon in sawalon ke ilawa aur koi soch nahi aati thi.
"Main pichhle paanch saalon se kya karne ki koshish kar rahi hoon? Apne aap ko sirf Umer Jahangir ke liye qabil-e-qubool banane ki koshish karne ke ilawa main apni zindagi mein kya kar rahi hoon? Kya Umer Jahangir ki hamdardi aur taras ki bheek ne mujhe itna kamzor kar diya hai ke ab main apni zindagi ko Umer Jahangir ke baghair sochne ke qabil nahi rahi? Aur khud us shakhs ke dil mein mere liye taras ya hamdardi se zyada kya aur kuch hai? Ya kabhi tha? Ya kabhi ho ga? Aur main kya saari zindagi Umer Jahangir ki ungli pakar kar chalti rahungi? Uski nazron se duniya ko dekhti rahungi. Alizeh Sikandar kya hai? Kya yeh poochhne ki koshish nahi karungi? Alizeh Sikandar kya kar sakti hai?"
