Shards: Book One of the Anderian Series

Chapter 45: Intimacy of Another Kind

Cian's fingers lazily traced over the nearly healed wound on my shoulder. Confusion and concern mingled together in his expression. From what we'd been told only the Fae could heal me, but it had been steadily improving. I had my theories, but for now, I kept them to myself. There was no need to give him false hope, and if I was wrong, the Fae would fix it, anyway.

Hopefully.

Smiling up at him, I touched his cheek. "Stop worrying."

A dark lock of hair fell into his eye as he shook his head. "If we hadn't been separated, you wouldn't have been hurt. What if the next time I fail you, you're killed?"

He shuddered. I sat up and scooted back until my back hit the headboard. Clutching the sheet over my chest, I stared at him, hoping my expression conveyed every bit of annoyance I felt.

"You're not the only one who almost lost someone. They told me you were dead. You don't think I didn't feel guilty?"

"Bria." He rolled back to his side of the bed and scrubbed a hand through his hair. "How did this suddenly turn into an argument?"

"Because you seem to have some sexist opinion that you're the only who gets to do the protecting. And need I remind you—" I pushed his arm hard enough he almost toppled over. "Until recently, you planned on handing me over to the people who nearly killed me. We weren't on some romantic road trip."

Cian glowered, and the bed creaked as he rolled out of it. The man had zero shame, pacing the small space as naked as the day he was born. If he was trying to distract me... well, I was woman enough to admit it was working. Even if my lady bits were a bit sore from so much attention.

"You're going to hold that against me forever, aren't you?"

I shrugged. "Whenever it suits me."

That earned a laugh. He dropped his naked ass on the bed next to my covered feet. "The idea of losing you... it makes it very hard to contain the beast inside of me."

"I'm not Bellamy."

Her name felt heavy in the room, but he didn't flinch. "I know that, and I won't lie to you and tell you what happened to her doesn't make me even more afraid for you. But knowing how I feel about you now I don't know how I ever mistook my fondness for her as love or a mate bond."

Outside the window, snow fell in fat flakes, and I watched them swirl and stick for several long seconds before crawling to him and looping my arms around his neck. He leaned into the embrace, gripping my forearm to hold me in place.

The intimacy of the position rocked me to my core. I'd fought so hard for so long against forging this type of connection with another, but most of my attention had been on how I had sex with my partner. That was its own intimacy for sure, but it paled compared to this.

As if reading my mind, Cian sighed and said, "I didn't say anything before, but I know I probably scared you when I told you I loved you."

"About that—" It had terrified me. Still did. But a small part of me I refused to allow to speak up knew it was true. And that I was falling too.

He twisted and kissed me. "I'm not upset you didn't respond. I won't pressure you. Honestly, I'm still amazed that you can actually feel the bond between us as a human—mostly human. It's more than I ever could have hoped for."

"Cian," I said, still breathless from his kiss. "I care for you deeply, but the bond and love aren't the same thing. I don't want you to confuse the two. I mean, look at Kohl and Bellamy—"

The man in my arms turned to stone. I leaned back and watched the color drain from his face. Shit. Shit. Shit. I had forgotten he didn't know the truth.

"What about Kohl and Bellamy?"

I licked my lips. Which truth to tell him? That Kohl was responsible for her death, not him? Or that they were mates. The first would alleviate his guilt. The other... well, no matter the love he felt for me, I thought it might break his heart.

"Bria, what about Kohl and Bellamy?" He shouted. The necklace pulsed in response, catching us both off guard.

"Promise to calm down."

His lips flattened. "I can promise you the opposite of calm will happen if you don't spit it out."

Four sharp knocks on the door saved me. Sheet wrapped firmly around me, I raced toward the door, my hand curling around the knob just as Cian's palm flattened on the surface above my head. The door didn't budge.

"They can come back later," he said, tucking my hair behind my ear as he whispered in it. One arm went around my waist, and he tugged me against him, flattening my back against his chest.

"This is cheating."

I didn't say I had every intention of telling him whether we went for round three, but at least this way maybe he would be lazy with endorphins when I changed the last centuries of his life with just two little details.

"Fuck," he gasped as I ground my ass against his hardness. "I've heard others talk about how difficult it is to focus on anything but taking their mate, but I never believed them. I could've shaken you on the bed I was so frustrated with you, but one glimpse of your curves under that sheet and I'm hard as a rock."

With a whimper, I dropped the sheet and put my hands on the door. Legs spread, thighs already damp as my body prepared itself for him. My greedy pussy pulsed in anticipation as he rubbed the tip of his cock in the wetness, bypassing my entrance and pressing into the seam of my ass.

"Oh god." I clamped a hand over my mouth as he pushed into the tight ring of my asshole.

"Soon," he promised with a dark chuckle. "But for now, I'm going to ruin this perfect pu—"

"Alright, enough you two!" Cara shouted, pounding on the door again. "I can only listen to so much."

Cian snarled and snatched up the sheet. He wrapped it around me, and positioned me so I hid his nakedness—especially the monster hard on poking me in my lower back—as he opened the door.

"Hi, Cara."

This was thoroughly embarrassing, but somehow, my voice came out more irritated than ashamed. The Fae grinned as if she understood, and the smile made her look just like her brother.

"First." Cara held up a finger. "The owner of the hotel wants compensation for his losses."

"What losses?" Cian and I asked at the same time.

"Four of the rooms on this floor demanded new rooms because of the loud occupants in this one." Her mouth twitched. "One elderly lady wanted to call the police because she said with that much screaming, someone was definitely being murdered."

"I'll talk to him," Cian said gruffly even as I shook with laughter.

Cara nodded. "Good. You can talk to him before we leave in a few minutes. Pack your bags. You two are heading to the Veiled Lands. Home of the Fae."