home and away Jaide Braxton

Flashbacks

Jaide pov

I wake with a start, the start of a bad nightmare at the front of my mind. I roll over, trying to ignore either. Tiredness tugging at my mind.

Climbing out of bed with a yawn, I grab my phone, turn the torch on, and make my way into the kitchen for a drink. Walking past the front door, the wind blows something banging against it.

I flinch, dropping my phone. A haze of Luke trying to break in flashes across my mind, and it's then I know sleep will not be happening for a while.

I continue to the kitchen now, turning the light on so I can see everything. I get myself a glass out and pour some milk into it. Putting the carton of milk back in the fridge and closing it with my hip, I drain the glass and head towards my brothers room.

The torch is pointed down when I quietly open the door, and my brother is fast asleep, small snores coming from him. I go over to his bed, turning my torch off, but I have the screen on and flick the covers back.

"Jay? Huh, he barely is awake.

"Shhhh, go back to sleep," I whisper. Climbing in, I curl up in a ball, eyes wide open.

I can feel myself shaking, and I don't even know why. The hand on my back helps. Slowly, I relax, unwinding from my ball. I roll into Brax's arms and allow him to continue to rub my back.

He's more awake now. I can feel it in his breathing."What's up, baby?" He asks softly.

I don't answer. I just push my fashion against his ribs with a shake of the head.

He sighs, "I will take that as either a nightmare or hazed flashback of something."

My slight tense at the question tells him all it needs to.

"Ok baby, try to go to sleep. I know the wind is probably not helping. Do you want headphones, or I can cover your ears? "

I nod my head. "Which one?" He asks.

I mumble it into his skin. It startles a laugh out of him. "Big voice, Jay,"

"Just cover my ears."

"Ok, sweetheart," I shift, so he is able to cover my ears with his hand, and immediately, it helps.

I can feel myself relaxing before I finally start to drift to sleep only for my eyes to pop open as that fucker from Albury flashes across my mind.

There's a knock on the door that I barely hear, Brax makes a hmm sound. It opens revealing Heath. He's holding Napoleon.

"Thought you might need this," he explains, bringing it over to me. Brax moves his hands to grab his passing it to me so I can hold him.

"Thank you," I mumble. I doubt he can hear me as my voice is now muffled by my stuffed toys fur.

I can hear him and Brax talking, mainly asking if I'm ok and if Brax knows whether it's Eli, the neighbour, or Luke. Apparently, I flinch as they said Luke and immediately know what is going on.

With a huff, Brax moves over in the bed and pulls me with him so Heath can climb in next to me. His hands join Brax's over my ears.

Finally, I can sleep.

When I'm awoken in the morning it's to a frantic voice of "where the fuck is Jaide?!"

The door flies open with a bang "Brax, Jaide is-" Casey's voice is cut off when he spots me curled up in between our eldest brothers with their hands covering my ears.

I look up at him, and he mouths something to me. I don't quite catch it, but I imagine he's asking if I'm ok. I smile and nod, which startles both my other brothers.

Brax untangles himself from me, pushing me over to Heath fully. I allow him to happily curling back up full intentions to go back to sleep.

"You joining or what?" I ask Casey, my eyes looking up to meet his. He shakes his head, leaving with Brax following.

Heath shifts a bit and picks me up, "where we going?" I ask tiredly.

"My room, bed is comfier." I roll my eyes. Brax's bed is comfier than his.

He plops me onto his bed, and I move myself up to the top, digging my face into his pillows and taking a deep breath. His smell is comforting and makes me tired. There's a laugh, "Do you do that with Ace too?"

I turn slightly to glare at him "yep"

He joins me in bed "your weird," he comments, booping my nose.

"Betcha Bee and Ricky do it too,"

"I don't doubt it. It's a weird girl thing, " he teases.

"It's not a weird girl thing! It's a comfort thing, " I mutter. I can feel my face flushing.

He wraps an arm around me, squeezing me into him, "Like you stealing our clothes? I had to go into your wardrobe the other day to find a jumper because the only two I had were dirty or being worn. " his voice has a playful growl to it.

I smother my giggles at that, I knew he only had one that was clean at the time, and I stole it to wear.

"It's not funny, you little rascal." He growls, digging his fingers into my sides, tickling me. I let out a squeal.

"Shhhh," he shushes me, laughing quietly. "Kylie is still asleep," he reminds me, but doesn't relent on the tickling.

Eventually, he stops, "I'm glad you came to one of us last night. It was better than waking to you screaming, " he finally admits.

I look down. "I wish I didn't have to come to yous though it's so annoying when the nightmares a flashes get like that. Sometimes, it stops me from sleeping for days."

He gibes me a pointed look. "I know. You're so difficult when that happens"

"It's not my fault" I pout.

"I know baby, it's not. You can't help it, I wish I could get rid of those memories for you"

"Sometimes it's not so bad, some of the nightmares that cause me to wake screaming aren't actually memories of Luke or the neighbour. Sometimes their just those assholes from across the road peling bricks threw the lounge room window and hitting you in the head. Occasionally it's the house being set on fire and none of you make it out. Sometimes it's Luke but not really because it's dad coming in"

Heath is silent for a few moments "shit baby I didn't realise they were that bad"

I shrug. "I've gotten used to them mostly and can normally tell when I will have one. If I get flashes or zone outs during the day then I'm more likely to get one. Those nights I normally stay up with yous and fall asleep in the lounge room and let one of you carry me to bed. Other times I just don't sleep"

"Jaide that's almost every night" I shrug.

"Like I said. I've gotten used to it"

"Is that why sometimes your barely in your room or the lounge room? Cause they're at the front of the house"

"Took you long enough to realise that"

"Jaide, why have you not said anything?"

"Because what difference would it make. I don't like being in front rooms but I don't have a choice. I gotta get used to it. I can't not sleep in front rooms for the rest of my life. What about when I have kids? I'm not risking it happening to them just so I can feel safe"

He brings me into a hug. I can fell Napoleon's nose digging into my ribs, I pull out of the hug.

"I'm fine. I have Napoleon, and my other stuffed toys. They help, why do you think I refuse to get rid of them?"

"Ok you have a point there. But also you've had that dog toy since you were knee high to a grasshopper."

"Exactly" I snuggle back into Heath and fall asleep to the sound of his heartbeat.