Benji (Ben Pincus / Kenji Kon) snippets

Memoria. [POST SEASON 5]

     A cool breeze swept through the coast of Naxos. A thin steel chain fell around Ben's fingers, swaying in the wind. He glanced at the water, then slung the diamond Star of David into the safety of his palm. His free fingers rhythmically tapped the side of the stone wall he lay on.

     The streets were oddly quiet. It was hard for Ben to determine whether he found it comforting or disturbing, but maybe he'd think about it later. At the moment, he gazed thoughtfully at the horizon— moonlight glittering the black ocean, stars scattered across the deep blue sky; an image so familiar yet so foreign. It, among other things, reminded him of the darker, beautiful time in his life.

     As he had for the past six eventful months, he replayed a summary of the drama on Nublar and Sorna— camp, the Incident, miraculously surviving alone, reuniting with his old friends, the albino Achillobator, Dr. Wu's reappearance, E750, escaping Nublar only to crash on Sorna, the Spinosaurus, the vessel, returning to the mainland, everything... it was all so strange to him; one day their lives were spiraling with chaos, the next they were in touch again with humanity.

     Naxos felt too cramped, too suffocating. Insanely, a large part of him wished he and the campers weren't found. He wished everyone finalized their conditions as deceased and moved on. He had lost connection with mankind so long ago when he awoke in the dense jungle, wounded and deserted. The only people who mattered now were the people he pulled through survival and adaptation with, and he wanted that to be their eternity. It was so fucking selfish.

     He relaxed his fist and angled his wrist so the diamond Star's surfaces sparkled. He felt a pang in his heart remembering the day he received the necklace, such a gift summoning a handful of questions. He didn't think he deserved it then, and even after everything, his opinion hadn't changed. Still, he held onto it like a lifeline, a last breath, as it was Kenji who gave it to him.

     Its condition was nearly as perfect as day one. A singular crack scarred the beauty, but Ben didn't mind it. It was incredible it made it that long, but Kenji did point out later that its materials were surprisingly durable.

     Kenji... Ben's ribs felt uncomfortably heavy. He knew he was blushing. He pressed the necklace to his bare chest, yearning for contact with the boy he loved. All he had was the jewelry and a scrap of paper with Kenji's number; the latter hidden in his room, useless until he had a phone.

     Six months had never been so long. Despite the anxiety and disgust accompanying his stay in the hospital, he longed to have those moments back. Kenji was always by his bed before a surgery or major check-up, squeezing his hand and calming his nerves with a certain tone he only used with Ben. His heart flitted thinking about it, but upon seeing bleached white buildings, the empty feeling came prowling back.

     He closed his eyes and imagined Kenji sitting on the stone wall, facing the water, staring off into the distance admiringly. It made him woozy, but the bittersweet hurt so good.