Making Her Mine- An IPKKND story.

Chapter 52 - Gaslighted

Arnav mulled over what Di had told him as he drove back to work. When had Aman told Di about this orphanage?

Arnav called him. "Aman, meet me in my cabin."

"Er— now, sir?"

"Yes, I'm on my way."

Aman was already there when Arnav strode in. "What's this about Di wanting to raise funds for some orphanage you told her about?"

Aman looked startled. "I— I don't know. She didn't tell me anything."

"When did you tell her about this orphanage?"

"I – I just mentioned it in passing, when we were working on the divorce. Anjaliji asked me if I was at work, and I told her I was meeting the orphanage people to discuss funds..."

"She didn't tell you she plans to start working to help raise funds?"

Aman shook his head, looking bewildered. "She asked for their contact.... I thought maybe she wanted to donate..."

"She sounded like she had it all sorted out," Arnav muttered. "She wants to raise funds for them. You know the orphanage. Help her, please."

"She wants to start right away?"

"That's what she told me."

"She'll actually be very good at it. They definitely need someone like her to help. And — it will be good for her. She probably needs something like this too, after what happened."

Arnav narrowed his eyes at Aman. It was a bit disconcerting to hear him say almost exactly what Di had.

"Did you — did you talk to her about how she's doing?"

"No, sir. I'm a bit concerned actually..."

"She's behaving far too normally after such a big shock." Arnav said, nodding. "I know."

"She's a very strong person. But, she was so devoted to Shyam — I can't believe how calmly she had taken all of this."

Arnav nodded again. "Well, if she wants to work for the orphanage... you know them — make sure they're good people — and let me know if there's some way we can help out."

"Definitely, sir," Aman said, getting up.

"And, Aman. Di's idea to get Khushi's Dabba business registered as a company – can you also look into that?"

"That's easy," Aman said. "Great idea, by the way. Anjali ji is really —" he stopped, and jamming his hands in his pockets, rocked on his heels. "Right, sir," he said finally and left.

Arnav raised an eyebrow. Aman was acting odd.

—

Di was in her room when Arnav got home from work. He realized, looking around, that she had got rid of a bunch of things from her room — pictures of Shyam, his books and belongings. Even the crib he had bought.

"Di. Are you okay?"

"Chotay," she said, looking up, hastily wiping away tears. "I didn't hear you coming."

"You don't have to hide your tears from me," he said, giving his sister a hug. "I know I react badly whenever you cry. But — I don't want you to have to pretend to be happy and okay either."

"I'm okay, Chotay," she said.

"Are you really? You've had a terrible shock. I expected you to react in a much worse way when all this came out. You don't have to put on a brave face for me, you know that, right? Whatever you need — I'm here for you."

"It wasn't such a shock," she said softly.

Arnav looked at his sister, puzzled. "What do you mean? You already knew?"

She shook her head. "No. But, I used to feel uneasy, sometimes. Remember, when you went to Lucknow, to buy Sheesh Mahal? Shyam suddenly had to go to Chandigarh, so I decided to go to Lucknow. To be with you, because I didn't know what was going on with you. We had this odd phone conversation. He was angry at me for going, and it made no sense. And he asked me a lot of questions about Sheesh Mahal. I couldn't bring myself to tell him what that place is to us... but I remember feeling uneasy about it the whole time I was there."

Arnav clenched his jaw. "You never said anything," he said finally.

"There was nothing to say, Chotay. It was just a feeling. And, every time he told me he would be with me but he wasn't, he always had a reason. It wasn't just that I was feeling neglected. He was so thoughtful, bringing presents from wherever he went. But I realize now, I would watch him closely, and sometimes he said things that didn't really make sense. Some of his friends, his clients, people he said he was helping, were so odd... and that ring... I found out he bought a ring, but didn't say anything. Then he suddenly gave me a ring, and made me feel bad for being suspicious. I've been thinking about it. It was Khushi ji's engagement ring."

Arnav was not a violent man, but he would have punched the living daylights out of Shyam if he could right now.

"He used to make these tasteless comments sometimes, and when I got annoyed, he would say it was just a joke," Di said, an unfocused look in her eyes. "And he told me so many times, he's happy that he doesn't have a family. Because otherwise he would have had to fight them to marry me. I felt so grateful that he chose me. That he married me, despite my broken marriage and my limp."

"Don't ever say that again, Di. I told you before, irrespective of what Shyam turned out to be. Anyone — you are the most –you're — I wish you knew..."

She smiled at this. "I can't explain it, Chotay. At first it felt like my whole world had ended. But it's a relief too. I always felt like I was a bad person for having these doubts. But now I know I wasn't crazy. All those doubts and unease, it was all there for a reason."

"Don't hide your pain, Di. Not from me, at least. We have been through so much together. You've been there for me my whole life. And I've always tried to be there for you too. Let me be there for you."

"I know," she said. "You and this baby are the most important to me right now. Without you, I don't know what I would have done. But I'll be okay. I'm waiting for her to come to this world, to call me Mamma..."

"You'll be the best mother in the world," Arnav said, eyes damp.

"And you'll be the best Mama."

"Kans Mama," he replied, a sudden memory flaring: Khushi telling Lavanya the story of Krishna, in which Di was Devaki, Krishna's mother, and Arnav was his evil demon uncle Kans.

Anjali giggled through her tears. "I can't believe Khushiji called you Kans to your face."

"She gets away with a lot," he muttered, although he was smiling too.

"It's fun to see her annoy you," Di said. "No one else dares."

"I only allow it because it makes you smile," he said petulantly.

"Remember the orange juice she put in your shoes?"

"Mango juice."

—

Note : This chapter is partly to make up for the lack of a direct confrontation with Slimy Shyam. I can't figure out how to work that into this story, so most likely there won't be one. I always thought in the show that Anjali was being seriously gaslit by her reptile of a husband. I'm sure most of it was to add drama, but there were many scenes where she seems slightly uneasy or suspicious, and many more where Shyam very obviously manipulates her and makes her feel bad for being uneasy/annoyed/suspicious. That's what gaslighters do, and I can't imagine being married to Slimy Shyam and not catch on at least a little that he's a creep. (((Shudders)))