The Idea Of Us (English Version)

17

"You weren't even circumcised back then!" I teased.

"Well, I am now—I'm ready!" he joked back, biting his lower lip.

We both laughed, amused by how comfortable we'd become with saying anything to each other. He offered to teach me about Wabi-sabi. I hesitated at first, but as I watched him looking at me, I realized—maybe this was the moment I'd been waiting for, the one where I could finally make things right.

I wanted him by my side when I finally learned how to love myself.

—

"This is it!"

I stood in front of him, scowling, while he just sat there on the bench, as if he hadn't disturbed my peaceful slumber. Who tells someone to come to the park at seven in the morning just to say 'get outside?' He called it 'step by step.'

"What do you mean, 'this is it'? Are you giving up already?"

He laughed briefly, unfazed by my clear exasperation. It was only the first day, and I was already on the verge of quitting. Instead, he looked like he was ready to egg me on even more.

There he was, legs crossed, arms resting casually on the bench's backrest, as if he were watching a sunrise over some serene sea. If I kicked him right now, would that knock some sense into him?

"You know, I really don't get it. What's the deal with 'get outside'? What's that supposed to mean? Just step outside, like we're doing now? Look around, and voila, I've learned Wabi-sabi? Yey, I'm so happy. Duh!"

He raised an eyebrow before a mischievous grin spread across his lips.

"You sure talk a lot. What's in your mouth that makes you chatter like that?" he asked, laughing. I shot him a glare and started kicking at the little stones in front of me.

"Don't take 'get outside' so literally. That's your problem—you're too literal! It doesn't mean just stepping outside because I said so. You go out to see how beautifully Mother Earth shines, even through its imperfections!"

He motioned for me to follow him. We walked around the park, and gradually, I began to feel the fresh air brushing against my skin.

Although it was a holiday, the park wasn't too crowded. I'd been here as a child, but as I grew older, I stopped visiting. Life became so hectic, and I became so focused on seeking validation—impressing people and earning their praise—that I forgot all about coming here.

Now that I was back, I looked around and noticed how much had changed. When I was younger, the park was filled with swings and children's play areas. But now it had been transformed into a city park, with benches everywhere and a fountain at its center.

I glanced back at Isaac, who was also taking in the sights. Then I returned to my own musings.

Some women in the park were sneaking glances at him. And why wouldn't they? He was wearing a thin white shirt, sweatpants, and white sneakers, making his figure all the more noticeable.

As for me, I was just in a fitted white shirt and cycling shorts. Nothing revealing, so I held my ground. I caught the women staring at him and then at me, their eyes rolling and lips curling in disdain.

I forced a smile and returned their glares with one of my own. Did they think they were the only ones who could pull that off? Ha! Think again.