Her thoughts.

4

A few days of the hellweek as an STEM student, there was an upcoming event in our school.

...
"Who's gonna join the contest to represent our section guys?" Our adviser asked, looking at everyone.

I wanted to join but still have the fear on me. i wanted to sing infront. But i was too scared of those prying eyes.

My hands wanted to raised, but it's just a low one. I was thinking so deep.

What if i just dissapoints everyone and everyone will mock me if i sing infront? what if i just tremble infront while holding the mic? what if i just drown to my anxiety? what i-

"Ma'am, Shila wants to join."

I was shock, glancing at him with a frown. how the fuck is he deciding?!

"You- Ma'am, i don't want to." I looked back at our adviser, pleading to erase my name but she just said.

"Come on shila, You can do it! You can find your bandmates, Goodluck on preparing, i believe in you guys." Our adviser said. i have no choice,i have a validation when it comes to teacher words.

On our lunch break time,i just stared at him, a bit annoyed

"Why did you do that?" I frowns.

He raised an eyebrow while grabbing his lunchbox. "Well? you wanted to raise your hand, you just don't have the courage." He replied with a shrug.

"But that doesn't mean you get to act without my consent." i said, with a hint of annoyance in my tone, also starting to eat.

"I'm sorry, But i can sense you wanted to join." He explained, taking a bite of his lunch.

"Sorry your ass."

I muttered, as i eat quietly, thinking of who could join me to this contest. i don't wanna be alone singing in front, or I'll only be trembling like a nervous girl. i don't want that.

"Got something in your mind?" He asked.

I scoffs, closing my unfinished lunch and putting it back on my backpack. "None of your business, Tristian."

I got up, deciding to go at canteen to think for the upcoming contest. I don't even know how to play guitar or even..sing that good.

Tristian Pov.

Ever since the school started, I've ask this one random girl if she's also in the same class, turns out she was.

On the class orientation, our adviser made us introduce ourselves with the question "Why did you choose STEM?" one by one to get us know better. when it was her turn, i focused on some details. I don't know. i feel like there's something more to her.

"Good day everyone, I'm Shila, Just call me that way, no nicknames. I also love writing and drawing. i choose stem for a Simple reason, to challenge myself ma'am."

When i heard her words, I can't help but make a humor joke in my mind. so she like challenge? we STEM are gonna go down on the next 2nd semester. name is Shila. Should i call her Shi? Oh wait, It could be good. I'll use that nickname when we get close.

When the day went by, our seating arrangements were arranged by our adviser, asking for those students who had a bad vision, I saw her raise her hand. Although I don't have bad vision, i raised my hand too. A little white lie to be her seatmate,i hope.

Finally, I'm seated next to her. now i can be her friend.

Being her seatmate, i always like asking her a lot even though i already get everything. I also noticed how she focused on her academics. she has academic validation.

After i went home,i immediately took my laptop, deciding to stalk her through our STEM group chat. looking for her at the members,i immediately cliked her account, scrolling to her Facebook account.

"Oh.." i looked at her some photos. she's quite different in her photos rather than in personal.

I check her featured photos,and then scrolls down, seeing that she just post 1-5 contents, It's all about poetry or motivational quotes.

"Is she into poetry?" I asked myself before immediately going to my TikTok account, trying to find her account, looking on the tiktok videos she posted.

Woah.

As i finally found it, seeing her tiktok vids. Woa. She's really different in tiktok her videos rather than personal. Is it because on the camera or her angle shape?

He thought for a second before shaking it off. Forget it. i find her more pretty in personal. Reality can't be compared to photos.

...

When our teacher announced about an upcoming event and some contests that needed a representative every section, I glanced at her, seeing her raising her hand but in a low raise, Our adviser didn't notice that.

I raised my eyebrow. She looks scared or something is stopping her. My eyes went down to her hand seeing her wanting to raise her hand but not having the courage. I took a second before speaking.

"Ma'am, Shila wants to join." I spoke, pointing at her.

Seeing here looked at me with a frown, it makes me stare at her for awhile. i was right she's more better than the photos she posted on her Facebook account, or her tiktok account.

Now she's mad, I knew it. but I couldn't just sit here watching her drown. Cause i felt like she was thinking too much inside even tho i don't know.

"Well? you wanted to raise your hand, you just don't have the courage." I explained to her, but there was a lot of explanation in my head,so I chose the shortest one.

"I'm sorry, But i can sense you wanted to join." I apologize, looking at her, sincerely.

"Sorry your ass."

I noticed that she was looking at the air, like she's in deep thoughts while just munching. i grip on my spoon and spoke.

"Got something in your mind?" I asked, looking at her but she just scoffs.

"None of your business, Tristian." She got up, making her way out of the room.

I immediately close my lunch, and put it back on my backpack. Maybe she's thinking about the contest, Or pressuring herself.

Following her to the canteen, I saw her sitting on the one of the tables, deep in thoughts while her hand rest on her chin.

Smiling, I called her to a nickname that I've created for her after being friends with her. I've only used it now so it's a first time.

"Shi!"

End of Tristian Pov.

When i heard him called me, my brows raised, turning my gaze at direction.

"Where the hell did you get that nickname?" i frowns slightly, looking at him as he sat down besides me, and chuckles.

"I took it from your name, removing the two letters "La" and Tada, 'Shi'." He explained,and i rolled my eyes.

"Not impressive."

I heard him chuckle and says something that made me looked to him.

"I'll be your guitarist, Shi. Count me in."

"Huh?" I looked at him with my brows raised. And he flicks my forehead, making me frown as I look at him with a slight confusion.

"You really have a bad hearing. does your ear has problem?" He joked and repeated what he said.

"I'm gonna be your guitarist. I trust your voice, Shi."

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