Boundless

(Miss)Direction

If you ever found love, how would it happen? Where? When? Whom?

The-Girl-that-went-to-the-moon once had fantasies, but when she left her life behind, all those fantasies became too heavy to be carried. She was not alone, though. The Girl had her team: people she could count on, that would be there no matter what - since no black ops agent of her division had much of a choice, they were all together until death parted them up.

Fer-de-Lance's team had been awaken for five months when the Girl successfully infiltrated Seizei. Months spent preparing for her next mission: briefing sessions, studying, training, soaking up everything about the planet, the facility, the lab.

And yet, nothing could ever have prepared the Girl for what she would find in that hellhole.

Love.

Found it, lost it, only to find it again in the most unlikely manner.

So what would the Girl do now? How would she keep it? And most importantly, not screw it? Valid concerns since most people probably won't need to get over torturing, traumatizing, and crippling their love.

All the above was more than enough to plague a girl with lots of issues - like crippling fear of losing the person (again) and by your own hand (again).

(Besides, who in their rightful mind would ever get close to a girl like the Girl?)

Lance had serious plans to make up for her wrongdoings for the rest of her life. Anything different than that would simply not do. It was the only way to ever be worthy of Ah'kaedh's company.

Of course, being pissed out of her mind was not conducive to such plans. Lance could have sworn to be unable to get angry at Ah'kaedh, and that alien could be a right asshole sometimes; demanding, bossy, unreasonable on rare occasions. Lance enjoyed all of him, even the difficult parts.

After being surprised by how the boiling anger was cooking her reason, Lance had to swallow a high dose of shock, so overwhelming it knocked the air out of her lungs and almost brought her to tears.

How many kids do you have? Lance had asked, and boy, she was not prepared for what he had said next.

How could I be so callous? She would ruminate that moment over and over for most of the following days. Lance knew about blooding Chivas; Ho'kan had told her about them - and how almost half of the young unblooded Yutjas didn't make it.

And she clung to that emotion because of everything going through her chest; those were the easiest feelings to deal with: guilt and sadness.

Oh yes, because anger seasoned by jealousy and betrayal was wrecking her reason - and the Girl knew it.

Ah'kaedh had a family of his own. For Christ's sake, that alien had children. Why would he hide the existence of kids? What more was the Enforcer keeping from her?

Why do you allow him to sleep inside you? Ze'ev's question didn't make any sense at first. She was expecting xenophobia, but... kink shaming?

The sexual aspect had confused, enerved, and embarrassed her. However, the Girl had days to think over the matter. That question had no measure of prejudice embedded in it. If anything, it implied Lance herself should not be letting Ah'kaedh around her.

No. What I mean; mated couples sleep together... Ze'ev then clarified.

Lance knew Ah'kaedh's people greatly valued honor. It's almost like Ah'kaedh's son was trying to appeal to my honor, she mused alone in the hospital bed two days after arriving at the Dark Blade's clan lands.