NAVIGATING 5 - tadgh lynch

WHEREISHE?

LILIBETH

Gerard somehow managed to get me away from the burning house and back into his car. I had my wits about me again when his car pulled up outside the Kavanagh's. I stepped out of the car and immediately felt a wave of nostalgia wash over me. When I was young, Gibs would occasionally ditch his babysitting duties to hang out with Johnny, and leave me with Edel. She never had a daughter, so we would spend hours in her office, dressing me up in dresses and bows. As strange as it sounds, Edel is one of the most important people in my life, and I don't have many of them anymore. I know Sadhbh loves me, obviously, but I think a part of her resents me. She already has a daughter, and Bethany and I were born only a few months apart. Edel has never had a daughter, Johnny has never had a sister. I think them moving to Cork was some form of blessing for me. Edel treats me the way I imagine mum would if she wasn't so fecked in the head. 

"Johnny, love, is that you?" Edel appeared in the hallway, and apron around her waist and a tea towel in her hands. "Oh, Lily, pet. Come here to me." She holds her arms out, walking towards me and hugging me tight. 
"Honey, your clothes are ruined. Let me go get you something." She insists, pulling away and giving me a once over, wiping the tears from my face with a wipe of her thumbs. 

"Could you just tell me where Tadhg is, please?" I ask quietly, feeling my cousins hand touch my shoulder. 
"It's alright chick, let her help you, then you'll see him when he's ready, yeah?" Gibs told me softly. 
"No, I wanna see him." I persist, a bit louder this time, though my voice is shaky from crying. "Where is he, Edel? Please." I practically beg, my northern accent thick with emotion. We stand in silence for awhile, before she nods. 

"Upstairs to the left, last door on the right." She says softly. I head for the staircase without a word.

Tadhg

The door creaked open and a heavy accent filled the room, "T?" Tiger? I hear the door close and footsteps nearing me. Her reflection fills the window I was watching the sun set out of. 
"Look at me Tadhg. Please." I lift my head. Brown on hazel eyes. She says nothing, only opening her arms, which I fall into. Lilibeth's not small by any means, but these last few months I've gained a few inches on her, so when I lean into her, my head grazes her neck although she's standing. Though, the raised mattress probably gives me a bit of height.

"I thought I lost you Tadhg. He burnt the house down." She whispers into my hair. I wrap my arms around her middle. 
"Where's my ma?" I croak out. She doesn't respond. I ask again. She hugs me tighter again.

No. nononononononononononononono. She couldn't have. That sick bastard. Tears swell in my eyes. My biggest tormentors are gone. Why am I crying? But she's my mother. She was my ma. 

And she's gone. I think she took a piece of me with her. I don't know if it was a good part or bad part. All I know right now, Is that I never want to leave this room, and I never want to let go of the girl In front of me, wiping my tears. 

lol. why did i waffle about edel at a time like this? Not a clue.

Y'know that one scene in derry girls and theres girls sitting in the back of the bus and michelle is like get up and one of the girls goes no ill get my sister big mandy on u???? well big mandys little sister is how I imagine Lilibeths voice. If u dont know what im talking about just look up 'derry girls shift your shirtholes' on tiktok and you'll know what im on about
Okay. love ya xx