NAVIGATING 5 - tadgh lynch

GOODBYES

TADHG

Joeys going to rehab. I already knew a few weeks ago, but as i stand beside my mothers headstone, I glance at my brother, and I realize I don't know when I'm going to see him again after today. That scares me. Way more then I'd like to admit. So instead I focus on the precise notes on a fiddle and the soft strums on a guitar, but mainly the fiddle. Mainly the girl playing it. It's like she grounds me. Like when i feel like everything is too surreal and I feel like I'm spiraling out of control, even the knowledge that she's one call away is enough to bring me back to earth. 

They began filling the grave again. This time with my parents in there as well. I couldn't watch it. I walked backwards for a few steps, before turning to walk out of the graveyard.

"Hey big guy," I heard a voice join me on the seat on the wall about fifteen minutes later. I knew exactly who it was. 
"You don't have to go." I whispered. Joey stiffened before sighing. "Yeah I do bud.." He huffed, then said again, quieter this time, "Yeah I do." 

We sat in silence for a few minutes, before he spoke again. "Take care of her for me. Shannon, I mean. There's only so much Kav can do." I nodded, and he spoke again before I had the chance. "And yourself. Don't let Darren get in your head Tadhg. He can be a real dick." I huff out what was supposed to be a laugh at this.

 "I know, Joe." I assured him, before he caught sight of Edel, or 'Dellie', as Ollie seems to call her. Before I know it, my brother has his arms wrapped around me. "I mean it Tadhg." He whispered, before patting my shoulder and leaving. Just like that. But that was all the closure I needed from Joey for the next few months.

This is a shit chapter and does not correlate to the actual funeral at all but wompity womp its a fanfic... speaking of fanfics..

Im starting a new one! I'm going to keep it in drafts until I finish this book... but basically it's not BOT at all.

Its actually Harry Potter! I was rewatching the movies a few days ago and I remembered how in love I am with Oliver wood sooo yeah... let me know if any of yous would actually read it. 

I used way to many '...' i feel like my granny.

As always, Love ya x