The Empress and The Titan (KnB fanfic • Murasakibara x OC)

it hurts but...

|Miyuki POV|

I couldn't sleep that night. I still couldn't believe it.

Atsushi really confessed. It kept on replaying in my head. Honestly it was getting me flustered. What is this feeling? I know I feel the same way but it's too complicated.

First of all, I don't think Seijuro nii will approve. It will take up my time.

Second, maybe I was proud to say I like him too. We have a good friendship and it's too valuable to ruin.

Lastly, there's Korea. I was leaving right after the ceremonies. Leaving Atsushi now, as a close friend, was hard enough. I didn't need to date him to figure out that much.

My chest felt tight and I kept on tossing and turning. In the first time in my life, I was left undecided.

.

|Atsushi POV|

Yukichin turned me down. I don't want to go to school anymore...

Just let me curl up here and die...

I planned this day for a really long time but it didn't turn out the way I expected it.

The whole walk home was awkward between us after that. We didn't talk at all.

I had to admit, it did hurt being rejected... Especially when I felt so sure. I thought Yukichin and I could be together and have a happy senior year full of dates and food.

I thought I could finally hold her hand, and hug her, and feed her. I thought I'd be able to give her my coat when she gets cold...

It hurts so bad.

•••

She smiled at me when I came in the next day. I smiled back but it was a fake one. I was still sad about what happened but I couldn't get through the day without seeing Yukichin.

I just had to be contented with being with her as a friend...

|Miyuki POV|

I couldn't look at him for a long time. I melted at his gaze. Now that I know how he feels, it made me more aware of how he made me feel.

.

Seijuro had stopped talking to me after the gala. He purposely avoided me even at home. It was awkward how I was friends with his friends. It's sad that my only brother and I had to be like this now that my days are numbered here in Japan. I lessened my time with his friends as well. It'll just be harder to say goodbye if I keep hanging around them.

Atsushi was all I had left now. And I rejected him like how most of my family members reject me. He gave his best but it led to nothing. I couldn't even eat those chocolate bars he gave me.

I want to. but I cant.

Why did he have to make this more difficult?