A/N: So sorry for the slow updates pookies, here's more chapter for u <3
TW: HEAVY ANGST, MILD BLOOD/GORE, SKIP TO THE FIRST ♡ · ♡ · ♡ · ♡ · ♡ IF UNCOMFORTABLE WITH SUCH TOPICS
So here he was.
Drowning in his own pitiful hole of wistfulness and pining. They were dead, and they would remain buried in the graveyard of his mind as Vincent traps himself with just him and his anguish. His soul, his heart-- crushed into nothing. It had to be this way.
He'd tried. Nothing could silence the racket inside him, and he would do anything to take it all back. To rewind, to before the non-consensual, uncalled, unwelcomed kiss, before the panic and suspicions, before the murder, before that one point where things started to take a terribly wrong turn. It had to be wrong. Vincent bathed in the silence of his apartment, a messed-up, twisted war raging in his mind.
A part of him wanted to end his own pain. An even smaller part of him wished it'd lasted longer, wished Rody had pulled him closer and kissed him back, kissed him until his lungs forgot how to function and he had kissed him like he loved him, loved him with the same intensity and ferocity in which Vincent loved Rody, or at least hard enough to convince Vincent that he did love him and let him bask in the blissful illusion just for a moment. A moment of kissing him back, just long enough fool him into thinking they were in some passionate romance movie.
That part of him, that flame--no, that would be too large. Candlelight--of flickering hope was snuffed out by the other part of him that just wanted to reset everything. This part of him was far larger in scale.
Images, meaningless, empty images flashed through Vincent's mind, carpet-bombing it with hopeless strands of hope. His thoughts were jumbled up in a tangled knot that made no sense whatsoever. He hadn't even noticed his finger had found its way to his own lips, the same ones that had been on Rody's earlier.
Images of him and Rody, tangled up in each others' arms, his hands laced in his messy hair. Another part of Rody he'd grown to love. His mouth fitting against Rody's in a languid embrace, knowing it was wrong when it felt so right--two mismatched puzzle pieces, tied up in each others' light, merging their bodies together. Images and scenes that were too painful to think about. Vincent touched one of his scars, pressing two of his fingertips into the split skin, which was a by now a dried dark red and purple mess with dry discharge enveloping the edges. The pressure on his laceration set his pain nerves screaming. So he dug his fingers into the wound, the helplessness and hurt still refusing to seep out of his now reopened scar.
♡ · ♡ · ♡ · ♡ · ♡
With a heavy sigh and an even heavier heart, Vince trudged into his bistro, making an immediate beeline towards his office. The last thing he wanted to do was run into Rody- but he obviously couldn't shut down his restaurant, his only pride- and firing Rody because of his own mistake would be cruel, too. And Vincent couldn't even bring himself to think of killing that man anymore-- he was in too deep.
He could only hope he would be able to avoid the Waiter as much as possible until one of them somehow work up one day and forgot about the incident. Unlikely-- but Vince didn't know what other option he had in his mental list of reasonable choice to make after a stupid decision.
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Chef's Kiss
RomanceShe was gone. Rody found it hard to believe. She was the one he thought he was waiting for all his life, and she was also the one who left too quickly. This couldn't be how it would end... yet it all added up- how she was always "busy," how she neve...
