And the never ending feeling of my throat closing off and the unmistakable pain of loss in my chest makes itself present once again. I'm laying here listening to cars pass by outside wondering if by some coincidence, I could go and end my suffering. It seems so easy in some aspects...yet there it is again. That stupid fucking promise. Some part of my subconscious loves to continuously remind me on a daily basis of how much I hate myself yet it proceeds to remind me that I'm alive and I can not personally do anything to change that unless I would want to make my promise to someone I...well...cared about...meaningless to the point where it would equivocate to me spitting on their grave, which, I would hate myself even more for. You would think that it wouldn't be so contradicting in that aspect. It's aggravating to say the least.
YOU ARE READING
I suck at life
RandomIm not good at saying whats on my mind...or expressing myself in general. So I'll write I guess. Something that let's me know this is real, no matter how I feel about any of it. If you suffer from depression etc. this is my trigger warning.
