Lassoing the Cresent Moon

19. Nostalgia

Before I went through the archways I noticed some misplaced bright yellow in the corner. I turned my head to see another cut out. This time of Kickin Chicken, another member of the smiling critters. I smiled softly as I approached it.

Kickin' Chicken and Hoppy Hopscotch were the first live smiling critter toys I was introduced to when I was younger. They brought laughter to the play care, always competing against each other and often trying to outdo the other. I admittingly was never fond of sports but something about Hoppy always motivated me to play. The same way Kickin used to have an aura of confidence and pride that would rub off on me on even my most sad or insecure of days.

No matter what I was afraid of, Kickin would always puff his chest out and dare me to try. If only the giant chicken could give me one of those pep talk now. I pressed the button with less than a shred of hope.

"Hey, I'm Kickin' Chicken! Wanna go outside and hang out?"

My mouth turned downwards at the implications. That was something I remembered him saying when we were in our dorms, or at school. None of us really questioned it then, but as an adult, knowing that our "outside" may as well have been an oversized basement with lights and plastic trees hit hard.

"It's looking pretty rad outside!" I could already imagine him folding his wings and grinning as he declared that over the school windows. I don't think I ever saw any of the smiling critters anything other than happy and excited. I wondered if he knew the truth.

"I've never been outside before... Will you come with me?" I tilted my head as the bravo manly voice shifted into one of fear. Once again, the voice lines of this cut out had been played with. "I'm scared..."

Definitely tampered with. Kickin Chicken was the coolest bird around with an overinflated ego that pushed him to do anything. He was never scared.

At least- He wasn't in the cartoons. I closed my eyes tightly. I should have known by now, the live Kickin' I used to know wasn't the same skateboarding cartoon on TV. He was a missing child who had never been outside that was forced to play the part.

A child that wanted to escape the horrors they knew everyone was facing.

I hesitantly pressed the button for the next line.

"Here, I'll step out first."

He was a child that tried to free himself and others.

The next voiceline was another scream that made my blood curl.

He was a child that died trying.

I stared at the cut out for a few moments. Did I interpret that incorrectly? I wanted to hope I interpreted that incorrectly. I tapped the button again to hear the lines repeat. It gave me no peace- instead my thoughts shifted as I went on towards Elliot's Express.

The living Smiling Critters played their cartoon parts perfectly, even now as an adult, it was hard for me to believe that all of it was acting. I couldn't remember a single suspicion back then, a single mistake, not one moment where the critters acted like one of us, or cried.

Maybe they were adults forced to live the same fate as Marie Payne...

Or maybe they were children that were punished if they did something wrong.

I closed my eyes and tried to clear my thoughts as I pulled a lever to open the doors to the train. I took a deep breath as I stepped in, not wanting to get lost in my dark thoughts. There was still so much information I didn't have.

Despite the train's age, the doors closed quietly. As soon as it began to move the TV turned on in an automated tape. I sat on one of the cushions as I listened.