The Echoes of Rivalry & Ruin (The Acamancy Series I)

Chapter 34: Emalyne's Emotions

When I woke up in a bed that felt completely unfamiliar, wrapped in strange covers and pillows, surrounded by these walls that just felt empty, a wave of confusion hit me hard. The one person I really wanted to be there wasn't beside me, and it just made everything feel so surreal, like I was stuck in a fog leftover from my sleep induced state. I lay there, trying to piece together my scattered thoughts, reaching for bits and pieces of memories from the night before that felt tangled up in my dreams, all mixed with the thrilling moments I'd shared with Paxxon. I had spent the night with him, at least I think that part wasn't a dream.

My mind was a whirlwind of images: I could still remember our picnic, the warmth of his body against mine sending shivers down my spine. The intensity of his kisses sparked a deep longing inside the both of us as he pushed me against the wall, our passion seemingly shaking the place, even causing picture frames to tremble and fall, it's a miracle that we didn't get hurt. Then, there was that wild tumble into his bed, and the fact he allowed me in this little oasis he had created, even if just for a night. As I dared to take in my surroundings, my heart sank at the chaos in front of me. Glass from broken frames was scattered all over the floor, along with trinkets that had been tossed aside, evidence of a night that had spiraled. So many signs of what could've been beautiful moments, yet I struggled to remember if we even shared any kisses against the walls of this now trampled haven.

Could it be that when we collided in the hallway, it was with more intensity than I initially thought? Had we unleashed such passion that the very essence of this space shattered around us? Or, even more troubling, what if something wrong had happened? Was there a break-in? Did I lay there blissfully unaware that Paxxon faced something terrible, while I slept soundly? Or worse, did he lose control and wreck this room out of anger, perhaps sparked by something I did? Did I unknowingly create a whirlwind that affected us both? My heart raced at that thought, as a wave of fear washed over me, making it so hard to see the line between desire and despair.

I rack my brain for the answers, but not even in my dreams do I recall anything happening to anger him. Paxxon was insistent in his touches and kisses. He was not rough with me, it was as if he needed me as much as I wanted him. He did not push me into intimacy I am not prepared for, my clothing was not removed at all let alone with force. Even in my passionate haze my mind was not too cloudy to allow anything to get beyond my comfort. I remained, and still do remain, in my under shirt, bra and underwear. Paxxon remained in his pants as well. Hands touched skins, but always stayed above the waist. No awkward or tense silences or actions passed between us. I passed out in a satisfied exhaustion in the very early hours of the morning. But here I am at 7:35 a.m. on a Friday morning, somehow awake without an alarm or a person to stir me. There appears to be no alarm set for our wake-up call, and there appears to be no Paxxon here at all.

I sprang out of bed, my heart racing as I quickly threw on my pants, driven by a need to figure out if I am truly alone. The room was wrapped in a strange silence. The chaos in the hallway really caught my eye. There were remnants of our passionate night that had turned into memories: a forgotten picnic basket, plates scattered like lost dreams, leftovers from a meal that once brought me so much joy. And then it hit me, Paxxon really wasn't around. He hadn't nudged me awake for class today, before leaving. My heart sank as I remembered he wouldn't be away to attend a class, none of his classes today are before mine, the familiar worry started to creep in. He knows how dedicated I am to my studies and how important each class is for my future, yet he left while I slept. But what if he had tried to wake me? What if he was in such a rush to get to his early morning Plant Mani training or an important leadership meeting that he forgot? Just when doubt began to set in, my eyes landed on something on the floor, a note tucked away among the mess, resting between the kitchen table and our beloved picnic blanket. It was a note for me, and in that instant, a spark of hope flared up amidst all the uncertainty.