You screamed so loud
"i love you i love you"
but i blinded myself
i didn't want to see
you weren't talking to me.
you were never faithful but i turned the other cheek
i let them have you while you had me
over and over you swore you'd change
"i don't know why i do this" but you knew your game .
trusting you turned out to be my biggest mistake.
you repeatedly impaired my heart
piercing my spine
and i still laid with you pretending you were only mine,
but i only have myself to blame.
i could have listened to my heart but instead i became a part of the game
you painted a perfect picture
blues , reds and greens
to conceal all the black that lied in-between .
what a fool i was from the very start i already knew how you loved every girl with all of your heart.
and yet i was still ready to wear your last name,
what a shame,
i fit so perfectly in your game.
a lover to past the time until you were worn out
but i was worn out too
from the lies , false hope , jealous actions and unbearable anger
.. but i was in your control i was restrained .
every time i wanted to quit
you'd be on your knees crying my name
and there i was in the arms of a fiend .. back in the game .
i became bound to a wicked love
and in the end there were no white doves
just pain and fake smiles and a kiss that became bitter .
and still i laid with you and let you inside and you placed a pinch of glitter.
i bet you didn't see that coming in your game
you pulled out your bow and arrow but that was not your aim.
we created a new life out of false love
and still you kept painting a picture you weren't proud of.
but through the reds , blues and greens black was starting to be seen .
because i became too weak ,
depressed and stressed i couldn't face reality.
i wanted to be selfish and erase what we had done but as i felt a little flutter i knew the time for selfishness was long gone .
how foolish i was to get caught up in your game
i knew my life from now on would never be the same .
you spoiled me rotten i admit you did but your anger and outbursts left me frail like a little kid.
i loved you unconditionally despite all your flaws but i knew this wasn't love because love should be raw.
and even though i loved you the best i could you still had to do what i always knew you would .
a stab not only in my back but our sons as well you decided to be selfish and say your farewells.
i begged for you to not light this final flame i wanted to help you be a better you but i knew it was time to end the game .
and as i walk away you wasted no time to cry another name,
i really do hope she enjoys your game.
I've realized my worth but my heart hurts
to know i'll raise a son that'll look up to someone like you .
am i not to be mad ..
that after these 9 months of aching
i'll be a full time mom while you get to be a part time dad ?
the games over and i feel so free
you're gonna regret playing with someone like me.
you painted a really beautiful picture just like a Vincent Van Gogh and just like him there was a lot that outsiders didn't know .
I must admit i truly enjoyed your game although i lost myself in it i did nothing but love throughout all the pain. Our love was unpleasant , forged , dim , and ghastly but in the end we managed to create something pure , golden and beautiful .
I must say i think I've won the game unintentionally .. i was blessed with someone who will forever love me unconditionally .
