PokRo want to know why Ryan choose him as a friend.
" weh Rul ! " someone called me and i look behind , oh one of Ryan friend- apa yang dia nak-? I stop and wait for him to catch up. " ye ? " I ask while he was taking his time to catch up his breath since he was running just now. " kau tahu tak ? " the man asked making me frown. " tahu ape ? " I asked now knowing what this man is talkin about. " there's a rumor kata Ryan baik dengan kau sebab kau sama macam kawan lama Ryan- dia dah lama dah tak de. Tak silap aku nama dia Hatoro , orang panggil dia Toro. Diorang dulu rapat macam mana kau rapat dengan Ryan sekarang. And i heard some of them kata asal nampak kau dengan dia kadang kadang ternampak Toro dari kau- " The man said , explaining things. Ryan never told him about this guy name Hatoro. Ryan never kept a secret about him or anything- but this Toro guy must be so special that Ryan never spoke about him to me. I sigh and just smile at Ryan's friend " oo- yeke takpe namti saya tanya Ryan. Saya dah lambat ni ade kelas , nanti lecturer marah pulak " both of the man bit their goodnyes and seperate
Ryan Ayam: Lepas kelas kat cafe tauu macam biasa
( sebab Ryan suka makan ayam )
Seeing that text PokRo reacted the message with a thumbs up
After class end PokRo went straight to the college cafe they usually hang out since Ryan's uncle is the cafe owner. Ryan was comfy to stay there since he was pretty close with his uncle and can stay there for a long period and eat n drinks for free hehe.
PokRo came and they say their Hi's and smiles asking each others about clases before start to study about the topic they don't understand- they help each other by explaining the topic the other person don't understand it was like their rountine now.
The scent of freshyly brewed coffee mingled with the sound of pages turning. Ryan and PokRo sat in their usual corner , sunlight spilling through the window onto their textbooks. It was their quite spot- a small escape from the chaos of the college.
Ryan knows this wasn't just a simple silence because they were busy studying or doing homework. Ryan could feel the constant glance PokRo was giving . But Ryan didn't want to confront it so he let the uneasy silence continue.
PokRo was looking down on his textbook taking a deep breath before having the courage to ask Ryan.
" Ryan... betul ke diorang kata , kau berkawan dengan aku sebab aku ingatkan kau pasal.. Toro-? " PokRo's heart races as he ask the question , but part of him already fear the answer. He spent so much time wondering if that rumor was true. There's a tight knot in his chest , and the words almost feel like they're choking him. Ryan freeze and raises his head quickly , looking at PokRo with a mix of confusion and concern.
" Jap- mana kau tahu pasal Toro- who told you about those things ? " Ryan's mind goes blank for a moment , surprised by the question. He can see the uncertainty in PokRo's eyes and something inside him tightens. Does PokRo really think that ? He can't imagine losing this man infront of him over something that he misunderstood.
PokRo just shrugs , looking away , trying to hide his discomfort. " Tak penting pun siapa yang bagitahu aku.. aku just nak tahu if benda tu betul.. aku ni pengganti Toro ke-? " The words sting , even though PokRo tries to mask it. He feels vulnerable- exposed in a way he didn't want to be. A part of him want to take it all back , to retreat back into the comfort of silence , but he's here now. And he needs to know where he stands.
Ryan pauses , clearly caught off guard but trying to stay calm , his voice steady but conflicted. " Tak- bukan macam tu- a-aku bukan pilih kau jadi kawan aku sebab benda tu. I choose you because.. I know you can fill the hole Toro left me. And you're the only one i could talk to without feeling insecure " Ryan's words are sincere , but his mind is in turmoil. He want to reassure PokRo , but the truth is tangled with so many layers of grief. He never expected things to get this complicated. He's been trying to fill the hole Toro left , but he never thought he'd find someone who could mean something to him in his own way.
And every time PokRo touches him , even in the smallest way or if it was an accident , Ryan finds himself wondering how he feels. He tries to ignore it , but it lingers in his thoughts making the moment feel heavier than it should.
PokRo still feels unsure , his voice softer but searching Ryan's face for any signs of truth. " So.. bukan sebab dia ? bukan sebab aku ni macam Toro- kan ? " PokRo's chest tightens as he waits for the answer. He doesn't know why he keeps asking. Maybe he's scared of hearing the truth , maybe he's just too afraid to find out he's just a stand-in. But at this moment , his whole world feels like hanging on Ryan's words.
Ryan takes a deep breath , looking down for a moment before meeting PokRo's gaze , his tone sincere. " kalau kau tanya.. ye aku rindu dia. tapi dia bukan sebab aku baik dengan kau. kau kan kawan aku mestila aku baik dengan kau. And I'm glad we've get this , whatever it is " Ryan's heart is heavy as he speaks. The grief he feels for Toro doesn't erase the gratitude he feels for PokRo , but he knows he need to be clear. PokRo deserve the truth , and Ryan's afraid of losing him by hiding the depth of his emotions.
PokRo lets out a quite breath , finally offering a small smile , a mix of relief lingering uncertainty. " i guess.. that's all i need to hear.. " The tension in PokRo's chest begings to loosen , and though he's still unsure , he can finally breath again. He doesn't know what future holds , but at least for now , he knows he is not just a replacement.
That's enough.
Ryan nods slowly , his voice quite but genuine. " kau bukan pengganti. You're You. And benda tu yang penting " Ryan's words bring a sense of calm and he finally let go of the weight he's been carrying. For once , he feels like he's not caught between two world- his past and the present. He's with someone who's here , infront of him , and that's what counts.
PokRo's chest feels lighter , but as Ryan speaks , something flicker in his mind. Ryan never have the intention to hurt him so he'll kept it to himself. He realizes that all the doubts and insecurities he carried were his own , not Ryan's. He's here now , and that's all that matters..
After all Toro did promise Ryan he will come back in another version.
YOU ARE READING
angst horror squad
Fiksi Penggemarmight be long might be short [ Request Are Open ] -------------------------------------------------------------- good people will never know what it's like to fail.
